Only in Florida: I'm Loving It

May 5, 2017 | Posted in Editorial Features by jack-blackbush

When the Craving Hits...

In my column Only in Florida, I'll be taking you down to the Sunshine State for the latest and greatest sex stories that can only be found in the craziest state in the union.

I wouldn't go so far as to say that I grew up on McDonald's, but there is a special place in my heart for that particular fast food restaurant. From Happy Meals to Big Macs, if I got to pick where we were going to eat, I would want something from the golden arches. And let's not forget that McDonald's had a play area. Oh, the hours spent in the ball pit. Even though I'm older and I know that eating fast food isn't the best, when I get a craving for McDonald's, it won't go away to until I hit that drive. One Florida woman apparently has the same desire as I do because she offered sex in exchange for some McNuggets.

It was late one night when Miss Alex Direeno flagged down a gentlemen at a local gas station for a bit of a conversation (or something), and the gentlemen just happened to be an undercover police officer. After a little bit of exchange, Miss Direeno and the officer got into his car and drove away. While they were driving the conversation turned to sex as they often do when to strangers meet at a gas station.

As the undercover detective drove north on 14th Street West, he told her that he wanted oral sex and she agreed to do it for $25. As they briefly went back and forth on the price, she finally agreed to perform the act for $25 and Chicken McNuggets.

Sadly, Miss Direeno never got her McNuggest - instead, she was arrested for prostitution and possession of drug paraphernalia. You kind of wonder if the decision was reached after a long discussion about the correct dipping sauce for the McNuggets. You see, there are some strange people out there who like honey, which makes no sense to me. The correct dipping sauce is barbecue. And if they are out, ranch is also acceptable. But not honey. They are crispy pieces of chicken, not a cup of tea.

There was no mention in the arrest report about which size McNuggets Miss Direeno was to get. I assume it was the 20 piece. Or the value meal. Maybe even she was going to supersize it.

via Miami Herald

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