February 27, 2015 | Posted in Celebrity by
If you ever by chance run into Kate Mara, Aubrey Plaza, Anna Kendrick, Jessica Hart or Dylan Penn, be sure to checkout this video courtesy of the fine folks at GQ Magazine. It could get you laid. Granted, if you're morbidly obese, monstrously ugly or monumentally broke your chances may decrease significantly. But if these sexy women are true to their words, all you have to do are the things they claim will get them to date you and all of your laughable shortcomings won't matter. Because a wonderful personality and a since of humor is really all that matters, my friends.
Hey, I know a few taco joints I can take Anna Kendrick too! You want questions, Jessica Hart?! Oh, I got lots of those for you. Some people say I ask too many questions. Politics is what gets you off, Kate Mara? I can bitch to you about the shitty job our republican-controlled congress has been doing for hours on end! I'm just the guy these girls have been waiting for. I can't believe they've had trouble finding Mr. Right when I'm "right" here!
Thanks GQ! I'm on a plane to L.A right now! Hot chicks, here I come! Hope they'll be glad to finally meet me!