A Fleshbot Guide to Valentine's Day

February 14, 2015 | Posted in Editorial Features by lux-alptraum

nullValentine's Day approaches – and if you're not planning on attending the premiere of "Fifty Shades of Grey" (or, let's be honest, couldn't get tickets), you're gonna need some sexy last minute plans to make this holiday of love extra luscious this year. But don't worry – your friends at Fleshbot have all the recommendations you need. Whether you're single, just getting started with someone, or celebrating a years long relationship, we've got some special picks that'll make this Valentine's Day a truly wonderful one.

[Above: Get inspired by this sensual evening with Jenna Ross.]

If you're going it alone... Sure, Valentine's Day is technically a holiday about being in a couple, but who says it can't be about celebrating the greatest love of all: that of you and your right (or left) hand? If you're rolling solo this Valentine's Day, don't let that get you down. Cancel the pity party and set up an intimate evening with the person you love the most.

The Food: Don't listen to anyone who tells you that a Valentine's Day alone is best spent three sheets to the wind – this is a night when you really want to treat yourself. Of course, going out to eat isn't an option on this night of all nights; so treat yourself with some of your favorite (and fanciest) delivery.

The Entertainment: Fifty Shades may have renewed our cultural interest in reading – but why not spend the night home alone reading something even steamier? StoryBundle has a collection of red hot reads guaranteed to make your solo VDay feel incredibly special (and if you prefer your entertainment to be more visual, well... we've got an entire website's worth of recommendations for you to peruse).

The Accoutrements: Again: you gotta treat yo' self – in this case, to the finest toys that money can buy. If you're packing a penis, consider showing it some love with a Pulse; if it's a vagina you're looking to pleasure, you can't go wrong with a Mystic Wand.

If you're in a new relationship... If you've just started dating someone, Valentine's can feel like a whole lot of pressure. Take it too seriously, and you risk being seen as coming on too strong; take it not seriously enough, and you could be read as feeling lukewarm about your burgeoning relationship. But it's possible to strike a balance between overly obsessed and utterly uninvolved – especially if you plan an evening that's lighthearted, fun, and doesn't take itself too seriously.

The Food: Chocolate? Champagne? Too much pressure. Avoid expectations and just do a quiet, home cooked meal (unless you want to try your hand at a White Castle Valentine's Day – assuming you can even get a reservation).

The Entertainment: If you're trying to strike a balance between sexy and chill, there's no better pick than a porn parody. We recommend kicking off your evening with WoodRocket's "The Room XXX" –  after all, there's no better way to say "I'm taking this just seriously enough" than with a wacky porn parody of one of the worst movies ever made. And, of course, once you've broken the ice with that bit of sexy weirdness, you can always move on to more traditional porn – which, it just so happens, WoodRocket has a whole heck of a lot of.

The Accoutrements: No couple's night is complete without some quality vibrator action – but introduce something fancy, and you run the risk of coming across way too strong. We recommend picking up something from the Fifty Shades toy collection: they're not too expensive, you can pass the purchase off as a joke, and, best of all, some of the toys are actually pretty good (the clit vibe in particular seems pretty decent given the price point -- though stay away from the over the door bondage cuffs).

If you've been together for years... There's no Valentine's Day like one with someone you've been partnered with for years. Sure, it might be tempting to blow it off – you guys have all year to be romantic to one another, right? – but why not take the time to recommit to your relationship with an evening devoted to sexy, sensual fun?

The Food: If you ask us, nothing says intimate romance like a chocolate butthole, but unfortunately the company that makes them is sold out through Easter. Our second choice? Turning your own body into a chocolate wonderland with an edible body chocolate (though whether or not you include any buttholes in this chocstravaganza is entirely up to your comfort level with rimming).

The Entertainment: Lelo has spent years creating erotic objects that help couples heighten their experience of intimacy, now they've produced a film that hopes to do the same. We don't totally get what it's about (though we know it stars the dude from "Starship Troopers"!) – but after all the hot nights Lelo's given us over the years, this seems like a worthwhile thing to check out.

The Accoutrements: There's no getting around this: you're going to want a high quality vibe that the two of you can enjoy together. Our pick? The Minna Limon, a cute little vibe that allows one partner to control the sensations delivered to their partner, coming up with (and recording) a fun pleasure pattern that's unique to the two of you.

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