Tera Patrick And Friends Are “Where The Boys Aren’t” … And You’re Not

Thanks to Showtime's incessant rebroadcasting of the 2008 AVN Awards, most heterosexualist audiences may be forgiven for thinking that Chi Chi LaRue is a failed Vegas lounge singer who marked the end of the show with a hysteria-inducing performance of a song we are pretty sure was titled "Tranny Girls Rock". But since we here at Fleshbot cover both sides of the waterfront, we know that Chi Chi is an eminently respected gay porn director and safer sex advocate who has also dipped his/her heels into the straight porn world on occasion until giving up that end of the business a few years ago over the lack of condom use in most hetero-flavored smut. Good thing that "Where The Boys Aren't" doesn't fall into that category!

The concept of having a larger-than-life drag queen direct a Sapphic porn spectacular isn't as farfetched as it may sound; after all, there isn't a single girl in the cast who couldn't learn a thing or two from Chi Chi about applying waterproof mascara or keeping lipstick off their teeth and still looking fabulous. And with the lack of male partners--and hence no need for condoms--there's nothing to get anyone's panties in a twist over!

"Where The Boys Aren't 19" (subtitled "Arabian Nights") stars Tera Patrick in all her glory as the Lady in the Lamp, who gets rubbed by costars including Briana Banks, Monique Alexander, Lexi Marie, Tawny Roberts, Mercedez, Lyndsey and Lacey Love, Lanny Barby, award-winning vintner Savanna Samson, and the amazing disappearing Stefani Morgan. And if that lineup isn't enough to make you wish you were there (whether you're a boy or not), maybe the exclusive preview gallery Vivid was nice enough to share with us will.

"Where The Boys Aren't 19" will be released later this month.

• Vivid (vividvideo.com)
• Order: "Where The Boys Aren't 19" (Adult DVD Empire)