Maybe it’s because we’ve got open-air banging on the brain, but if we were this hottie fucking couple, we’d throw open the shutters and let the cool night air waft over our writhing, reverse cowgirling bodies. It adds a bit of dusky, twilight romance to the whole encounter.
We don’t even really have the space, but we’ll make it work for her. If she just stays perched up there on the couch like that, she doesn’t even have to pay rent. All we ask is that she let us sup upon her fantastic puss on occasion. Move over, Diane Deluna! Or on second thought, stay right there. We’ll make room for both of y’all. It’ll be fun! We’ll make family dinners, watch some great TV together, share some laughs and cunnilingus duties. This will work out mighty fine.
It might seem like an equation that doesn’t add up, but believe you me, sluts defy all logic and make it work. That’s the great thing about ‘em… Where there’s a slut there’s a way. In addition to their science-defying dexterity, they’re also great at 69ing and BJs. What’s not to love?
Because that’s really the best way to bang them in what we’ll call a lovely modified doggy. But, you know, this Remy’s such a li’l sex rocket, hanging onto her by the arms is basically insurance against her shooting way up into the stratosphere. Yeah, there’s a lot of power within that petite little frame. It can be dangerous. But we’ll take our chances with that Remy LaCroix. It’s no surprise she was AVN’s 2013 Starlet of the Year! Now we just have to make sure to keep her here on earth — and it looks like a little consensual strongarming and a solid slam works wonders.
You know, the title of this lovely film is “Cougars VS. Kittens” — but we don’t really see a whole lot of antagonizing going on because it seems like Diana Prince and Ash Hollywood are pretty into working as a team to get off the gorgeous high-school-quarterback-next-door that is Tyler Nixon.
We really like the abstraction — and arguable excess — this facial entails. We can really sense the movement, the motion, the feeling behind every careening arc and sweeping streak. This may be our most affecting Facial Friday yet!
Hey y’all, it’s Florabel’s birthday today! And we/I can think of nary a better way to celebrate than with the aforementioned holy trinity of B’s. Or… quadruplicity of Bs, counting the “bouncing”. Or maybe quintuplicity, counting birthday. But hey, this ain’t an occasion for doing math! It’s a day for watching April O’Neil vaulting up and down atop a massive schlong so hard and fast her tits nearly ascend to the heavens. If that’s not a celebration, we don’t know what is! A happy day to us all.
We’re not sure what the implication of this fine film’s title are: “Mistakes of our Mothers”? Hmm. Well, at least we’re not sure how they relate to little Mia Gold, because she has all the right and proper moves as far as we’re concerned. So, you know, whatever they were — we’re thankful.
But, uh, a spirited reverse cowgirl bangathon is totally cool. Hey, we didn’t make the rules. We just enforce them — albeit loosely. We will also accept a regular rollicking cowgirl, you see. Also, 69ing? Hell yeah. Oh, and mutual masturbation is cool too. And jeeze, when it comes down to it we guess we’re even okay with missionary. Heck, do what you want — just aspire to be like Nikki Seven while you do, okay? That’s a positive-ass role model for you there. And we’re all about positive ass!
You know the rest. Yeah, Riley Reid is the kind of classmate who’d be leaning against her car in the parking lot smokin’ a ciggie before first period. The girl who’d sneak a test out of the teacher’s desk to cheat off the answers. Who’d make out with the other kids during study hall. And she’s the kind of gal who would use detention as an opportunity to take her top off, spit on her tits, rub ‘em around, and give a playful smile. Oh, how we’d have her name scribbled across our notebooks amongst ornate doodles of hearts and stars! We’d play M.A.S.H. and wouldn’t mind ending up in a shack with an El Camino with you, girl.
It is nice that porn-watching can still be a journey of discovery.
