Yes, it’s another one of those pictures that appeared and then quickly disappeared from Rihanna’s Instagram. This was accompanied with the caption, “And that a #wrap!!! #pouritupvideoshoot #whenday2becomesday3 #whenthephuckdid8amgetthere.” How else are you going to celebrate the end of a music video shoot? Flowers and a trip to Denny’s? Hell naw. Thong on thong on ass. That’s how we ball out.

Wait, can we use Instagram as a verb? Anyway, Rihanna posted this photo to her Instagram account with the caption “I’m a fan of all my fans! They left the concert and went to #WERK #VIPtix #diamondsworldtour” but then took it down soon after. People saw the nipple piercing (which is beautiful) and then instantly assumed it was RiRi’s. But we know better than that–we know there should’ve been a tattoo beneath those boobs!

We’re pretty sure her hair doesn’t look like that these days, and we know for certain that there should be a big tattoo beneath her boobs, so when/where did this come from? And who organized the pictures into a handy little mosaic for us?

Word on the street is that this image leaked out of Rihanna’s private stash, but we have our doubts. Usually, when someone presents an alleged celebrity sex picture, we examine the face first; in this case, we can’t. So, how well do you know Rihanna’s ass?

Or wait, should we say piercings? We always forget if Rihanna has one nipple pierced or two. Damn, we’re slipping! This is the kind of thing that will get us kicked off the team at our weekly Sexual Rihanna Pub Quiz. (Grand prize is the shame of being obsessed with Rihanna’s sex life, tempered by the fact that everybody else is obsessed with it too.)

And from the looks of this picture, Rihanna is happy that her nipples could join her on this auspicious day! Isn’t it nice to see them getting along? We were worried that Rihanna was neglecting her nips in favor of her ass, but this public appearance proves that they’re on good terms. We get concerned about celebrity couples, you know?

They’re really nice boots, Rihanna! They’re so round and bouncy and fleshy, we just wanna squeeze ‘em and chomp on ‘em and never let them go. And the way that thong disappears between them, and that spot where they meet the thighs–yeah, that’s the stuff right there.

If you read that dress code memo CBS sent out to Grammy attendees, then you know that they specifically forbade the wearing of “sheer see-through clothing that could possibly expose female breast nipples.” Rihanna did not follow CBS’s advice, and everybody saw her female breast nipples, and the Grammys were ruined.

Rihanna, is that a pastie shaped like a nipple? Or your actual nipple? Because if we get thrown out of formal places when we try to show up in those shirts that look like tuxedos, cuz maître d’s are all like “sir/m’aam, that does not count as an actual tuxedo” and then we rrrrripp off our stripper pants to reveal that we are also wearing those underwears that look like a tuxedo, and they still won’t let us into the Golden Globes, then it is not fair that you get to go out in public with pasties that look like glorious nipples and get away with it.

It’s times like these we start to worry about the underwear industry. How can anyone sell a bra with all these celebrities walking around braless? A lot of people look up to Rihanna (we think, though we could be wrong about that) and when they see her not wearing a bra, they think, “I’m not going to wear one either. I’ll be free and stiff-nippled just like Riri!”

Actually, we think she was changing because she wanted to put on a new bikini, and this has nothing to do with us, but incidentally, we’re pretty pleased with the whole event. Rihanna undressed (and smoked something) in front of a balcony door in Barbados, and the cameras were there. They’re always there.

Another year, another crop of delectable celebrity nudity to ponder and peruse. There’s been such a good crop of skin this year (and we’ve got a soft spot for it all) that it’s hard to choose our favorites. But choose we must, and shall! Our pervy mind swims with Paz and Lena, Rihanna and Amanda, and… Helen Hunt? Oh well, who’s to dictate whither the heart and loins fly?

Wine, a fur hat, fake fire, and no panties: these might not seem like the most Christmasy things right now, but when people all over the world start following Rihanna’s lead and sending holiday cards with their bare asses getting down with Bordeaux, we’ll have a whole new set of traditions. We suggest you hop on this bandwagon before your friends do.

It’s cool, you don’t have to hide it. We noticed you acting all tight-faced and weird like you have to pee or something, and we know that means you’re trying to peep more of Rihanna’s sweaty shoot she did for GQ. Do you feel this way because you feel burned by the uncensored “Unapologetic” cover? Don’t hide your feelings from us, we’re your friends!

Over the years, we’ve many chances to maybe see Rihanna topless–there were the alleged leaked nudes, the various and sundry nip slips, and that one time she was dancing topless in a field and someone snapped really blurry pictures of her. Now, the internet purports to have discovered the uncensored, original version of the cover for “Unapologetic”–but is it the real deal?

It’s comforting to know that even after seven years of singing, performing, and being a celebrity, Rihanna still gets a rush of adrenaline when she steps out on stage. She’s only human, and we’ve all had those moments when we’re about to address a crowd and our nipples try to knife through our clothing.

Old news: Rihanna is hot. Duh, you guys. We’ve been saying that for, like, forever.

New news: Rihanna’s areola is on view in GQ. Granted, it’s not the first time this bit of colored flesh has spent some time with us, but it’s still novel enough that we’re pretty darned excited to see it.

Judging by this photoset, Rihanna and Kate Moss are both versitile switches, capable of turning on a dime from sultry crop-wielding dominatrix (hold the phone, are those silk chaps?!) to lacy submissive sex kitten. In other words, they are both our kinda girl.

Get it? Because these are pictures from the making of her music video for “Diamonds.” We probably should’ve explained that before calling her nipples diamonds or putting quotes around the word in the title. Now you probably think her nipples are as hard as cubic zirconia and that’s absolutely wrong.

If Rihanna goes out braless, you can see her boobs. If she wears a bra, it’s sheer, and she’s also wearing a sheer shirt, so that’s that. If she wears a dress with thick fabric, her nipples announce themselves by poking out. If she wears a black tanktop, her boobs stretch it to translucence and her nipple ring somehow sticks through it.