Naturally there are tons of insane difficulties that come with being a US soldier at wartime. Constant danger, unrelenting conditions, time and space between yourself and those you want to fuck the shit out of… But when you do come home? All that pent up energy is unleashed as you beast your waiting babe.

We were excited to hear gorgeous lesbian babes wielding the language of love in some very dirty ways. However, these babes tend to take the strong, silent route. We guess at French Army getting it on has gotta be covert.

Jessica is an Army wife whose husband, John, is away in Afghanistan. What better way to cheer him up than to send him a film of herself and his best friend fucking? “My Wife for Porn” is an interesting compilation of amateur videos from contemporary and ancient times (one of

We’ve been waiting for Digital Playground’s next feature film for a long time, and now that we have all the high-octane military masturbation fuel we want, we don’t know what to do! Step 1: let’s check out that reverse gangbang. Yes, these features always have climactic group sex scenes, and

Ulorin Vex (sexoteric.com)

It’s a jungle out there–and by “there” we mean “the living room.” Yes, camouflage has its benefits even in suburban environments, but the trick is that you have to keep the fatigues on your body. Once you start hiking up your skirt, it makes it much easier for predators to

We were reminded today—by North Korea of all places—of one the biggest truths that all real military geniuses understand: Women make the best soldiers. Why is that? They’re smart, resourceful, and can take a lot more pain that most men. Also, unlike men, they don’t spill all of their nation’s

Hey there, Zabrina Aamir. We try not to get too crass around these parts, but we just have to tell you what nice bazookas you have. (Oh, and that heavy weapon you’re toting is pretty impressive too.) (gallery @ dachix.com)

How can we bring troops home from Iraq faster? Apparently, we just need to send them all porn, because that will get them kicked out of the country. Seems like an unusual strategy, but it’s just crazy enough to work. (bostonmagazine.com)

We have never understood the army’s “don’t ask, don’t tell” policy. If someone in your unit were having forbidden sex–gay, straight, or otherwise–wouldn’t you want to know all the details? After all, everyone loves a man or woman in uniform–and putting all those sexy soldiers together on one base is

OK, enough of this girly stuff–it’s time to butch this place up! Maybe some nice combat porn will make us feel tough and manly again? No more droning on about relationships or feelings or fruity sissy drinks will be permitted on this site for the rest of the day. (Well,

Australians are scandalized that London-based Australian Bollywood actress (how does that work?) Tania Zaetta may have cheered up Aussie troops in Afghanistan by boning a few of them when she visited their base. (She probably didn’t, but it makes for good gossip.) Didn’t they get the “support the troops” memo?

U.S. soldiers are mounting protests to fight the proposed ban on Playboy, Penthouse, and other girlie mags at base stores. Since they’re also fighting to give the rest of us the right to stay at home and jerk off, don’t you think we should return the favor? (stripes.com, via avn.com)

We ordered you to bring us footage from the vaults of the East German military’s secret porn stash … and fortunately a good and loyal citizen who is not afraid to inform on fellow internet residents has obeyed our wishes. We will be sure to mention this in our report

Researchers combing through the Cold War era files of the East German secret police in Berlin have uncovered a startling new secret about the military powerhouse that struck fear into the hearts of Western Europeans for decades—they loved their porn. In fact, they didn’t just watch it … they made

In what sounds like the setup of a bad porn flick, combat pilots in the Israeli air force may soon be taking Viagra to improve their performance … in the air. We’d make a joke about the Mile High Club, but that’s too easy. (An “Assraelis” joke, on the other

Why is this soldier running away from his enemy (and choosing to hide in someone’s basement rec room?) Not only does he make himself incredibly easy to find, he has no choice but to give in to his pursuer once cornered. On the other hand, she is clearly not interested

No, that’s not a Sleestak—that’s a fighter pilot who has crash landed into someone’s living room tent fortress with a trusted wingwoman. As you know, standard Air Force protocol in such stranded situations is to pretend you’re on a picnic and start fucking, lest any enemy combatants discover your position

We’re not sure if you’ve heard anything about it or not, but the United States kind of got itself involved in a war recently. A couple hundred thousand (give or take) military personal are currently overseas—many of them directly in a combat zone—and they’ve got a lot on their minds,

Officials from the Royal Australian Navy are being called in to answer questions about their policy of taxpayer-funded breast enlargements for female sailors. We have some questions of our own and most of them can be answered with a few choice photographs. (telegraph.co.uk)