More pleasant (much more pleasant, actually) than watching the awkward sex on restaurant equipment on display in “LA MILF Truck” is knowing that that same truck sells authentic New York Italian Ice to little leaguers across the San Fernando Valley.
We normally turn to them as bastions of goodness and truth, gentle beacons lighting our path through the murky woods of life. But sometimes we turn to them for their MILFy tits and questionable taste in fuck-dudes, and hey, that’s cool too. Because a doggystyle MILF-bang is illuminating in its own right.
Oh no! Someone’s using the shower at the beach and Jennifer Nicole Lee can’t get her spray on! Not a problem. Jennifer has a backup plan: a gallon of water in a jug. It’s only gonna take a few quick splashes to get this show back on the road.
Maybe it’s “okay,” but I don’t believe that Eva Karera is this guy’s mother in-law. He’s not wearing a wedding ring, and Karera refers to the unseen woman as her daughter, not his wife, or even the more familiar “Becky.” See? The Social Contract has been broken already.
We don’t know if this MILFy lass knew what she was getting into when she rolled into bed with this fella. And then subsequently rolled out of it in the embrace of his strong, strapping arms as he raised her skyward to bang with the fury of a thousand suns.
Heck yeah, Ulrike Kriener! We stand by your wild convictions and your commitment to sass. Let everybody see your man’s hands on your ass as you dance, roll with a motorcycle gang, blast music as loud as you want, and if anyone gives you guff, flash your titties as you laugh and laugh.
In the perfect world, all parents would get paid time off to be with their children during their earliest years. Sadly, we’re a long way away from that world, but maybe we can convince the government to send exceptionally-hung studs to the hard working MILFs of America every now and then, maybe with a few vouchers for the fancy lingerie of their choice. So, who wants to write up this We the People petition?
We’ve often pondered the camouflaging or misdirection possibilities of translucent shirts, and we wonder if Demi is taking advantage of it. If we were any people who got hit with big camera flashes, we’d totally wear bras decorated with numerous stray realistic nipples, just to throw people off. Is that what you’re up to, Demi?
“Alicia’s college guy from the bar just left and I walk in the room. She is laying there with dried cum on her face, sweaty and smelling of sex. Even though she just got fucked, she is still horny and playing with her vibrator. I plugged in my camera and had to fuck her.” Touché, fellow. We salute you.
These are some interesting MILFy matrons we’ve got on our hands. When they catch their naughty teen daughters sneaking boyfriends into the house, instead of lording their craftiness and omniscience, they enthusiastically jump into the action! They should take this style of parenting to the next PTA meeting, right?
Our fascination with Diana Prince started when we read an interview with her. Then we had to read another and another, until we became intoxicated by her sharpness and we found ourselves repeating her stories to friends who have zero interest in the adult industry. We figured you folk would find Diana Prince a lot more interesting than our (so-called) friends!
Phoenix motherfucking Marie, y’all: you know the name, you know the butt, you know the power contained in this mighty performer, and if you know what’s good for you, you will drop to your knees and worship her. It was painful to only pick five scenes for this woman, but we did it, and we think you’ll enjoy them (there’s even a full free scene waiting for you)!
There are those sweet and demure MILFs — the cookie-baking, local news-watching, cheerful grocery-shopping ladies who are bestowed her title in name alone, and whom we must admire from afar. Then there’s the other kind, the kind with that devilish smile, that sultry glance, the look that says, “I’d like to fuck too“. Yeah, you know the kind we mean. This kind.
By our count, the age-bending sex and hardcore humping that goes down in “The Stepmother 8″ will mess up one marriage for sure, and possibly interfere with the foundation of a second marriage. But who knows if it’ll stop there? It’s possible that after watching this film, you’ll be inspired to leave your wife for her hot mom. It’s sinspirational cinema.
Explanatory scenario 1: “Una dear?” queried Mrs. Healy. “How does one summon the paparazzi?” “Oh, it’s easy, mum. Watch me.” Explanatory scenario 2: “Hey, mom!” “Yes, Una?” “Check out this sweet knee tattoo I just got!”
As we recently learned from Porn MD’s interactive porn term analyzer, the most searched-for term in America is “MILF.” That fills us with a great sense of pride! Why? Because MILFs are magical, and today we’re going to spend some time meditating on the term.
