We know, Christmas is over and you want absolutely nothing to do with it for another eleven months. That’s cool. We empathize with that. However, you can’t just ignore Micaela Schaefer’s holiday angel outfit with the pink wings and the monokini. If you don’t ogle this angel, it will retroactively ruin her Christmas.

After all, Micaela Schaefer was nice enough to take a shower in front of millions of people on the German “Big Brother,” and we got to see her wash all her nooks and crannies (ooh, lady crannies), so the least we can do is film ourselves showering and send it to her. It’s not about being a creep, it’s about solidarity.

You might think this is cute now–what with Micaela Schaefer walking around Berlin topless, toting a pink laptop like the college hottie of your dreams, hanging out of helicopters and making it look oddly sexy–but soon you’ll be surrounded by calendars and we’ll be asking you to put up babes on every last square inch of wall space you own. So let’s enjoy Micaela’s body while it’s the only one in the 2013 calendar game.

We weren’t even aware that the 2012 UEFA European Football Championship (aka Euro 2012) was nigh — but now we are, thanks to Ms. Micaela. See, she is useful for something! Expanding our sports awareness one soccer-ball-painted boob at a time…

It’s not the translucent part that we’re having trouble with; it’s all of the other articles of clothing she’s wearing in addition to it. The bikini top doesn’t match the deep-plunging “Borat-style” bottoms (though we suspect both might come from Wicked Weasel), she’s then added a fishnet body stocking, a belt, some rope tied around her neck, torso, and one leg, and a watch. Are we looking at the hot new German beach style?

Now that’s a tall order! We became familiar with Ms. Schaefer after a probably intentional nipslip last October, and, well, she’s really taken things to the next level for the Men In Black 3 German premiere.

Yesterday we took a moment to wonder aloud how Micaela Schaefer’s outfit could actually be containing her boobs. Now we know the answer: it didn’t. Enjoy the resulting nip slip (which, judging by Ms. Schaefer’s naughty grin, was probably premeditated.) (Via Boobie Blog)

By which we mean, it seems scientifically impossible that Micaela Schaefer could be displaying this much boob without a hint of visible areola. What sort of advanced technology went into the creation of this outfit? And is there a chance that, maybe somewhere out there, there’s an even more advanced