Think about it: would you rather go out and retrieve lukewarm food so you can gorge in the privacy of your apartment, or stay inside and see what pictures of these busty goddesses didn’t make it into Front? Even if you’re starving, you’ll find that these boobs and butts nourish you in a deep and meaningful way. (Eat some crackers while you ogle, if you must.)

Emma Frain and Holly Peers: brunettes. You might think, “There are so many brunette lad’s mag girls, they must feel comfortable and welcome amongst them!” Sure, that’s partially true, but consider the loneliness of being one of many brown-haired babes, part of a rolling sea of huge boobs and perky butts. Look at these outtakes from Nuts’s upcoming “Naked Brunettes” spread and tell us what you see.

Come on, Holly. Really? The Lakers? It’s not that we dislike the team (at least, we’re trying to separate our dislike of them from this situation), it’s that we think you could’ve gone in another direction. You could’ve put on a Celtics jersey and pulled a weird Boston Tea Party/greater U.K. thing! Or you could’ve put on a Golden State Warriors jersey and everyone would be like, “Who are the Warriors?”

When’s the last time you went to the circus? If you answered, “Last week, and then a month before that, and every time the Ringling Bros come to town,” then you are exactly the person La Magie calendar was made for! It has all of your favorite lad’s mag babes looking like clowns, contortionists, tightrope walkers, lion tamers, and ringleaders, except they have their boobs out and that’s not family friendly.

You could check out the 2013 Hot Shots calendar, but the final product will likely show the girls looking like badass military pin-ups. If you want to see Rosie Jones, Holly Peers, India Reynolds, Sam Cooke, Kelly Hall, and Emily O’Hara running around topless irresponsibly pointing guns all over the place with silly looks on their faces, you should check out these behind-the-scenes photos.

Since we’re American and we seldom use terms like “rude” to describe sexual naughtiness, our idea of Very Rude Pics involves Holly Peers cutting in line, laughing at others’ misfortune, not holding the door for people, and stealing from the elderly. Thank goodness this is a fetish-heavy shoot with lots of latex and whipping. That’s the kind of rudeness we can get behind.

Actually, it’s just Kelly Hall who wants to be Lucy’s cat. She said, “She’s so lovely! She’s actually just a very warm, king love machine. She has all these posh cats that she feeds gourmet fish to and strokes on her lap. I would very much like to be Lucy Pinder’s cat. Imagine being stroked on Lucy Pinder’s lap all day!” We figure the other girls are going to get jealous and want to join in.

The 2012 London Olympics officially begin on Friday! We’re so damn excited for the pageantry and the magic and the human spirit triumphing over the flesh! Anyhow, before we start praising the lean, muscular, and sharp bodies that will be competing against each other, we’d like to spend some time admiring the fleshy, curvy, and supple shapes of British lad’s mag babes.

Holly Peers is pissed about the stereotype that women in the sex and fashion industries are catty bitches who hate one another. She’s joined forces with India Reynolds, Emma Glover, and Nicole Neal to dispel that myth once and for all. I mean, look at these ladies. They assist each other with their clothing, they hold one another up, they give each other back-rubs when they’re feeling worn out … damn, they even assist the photographer with fancy old fashioned cameras!

We know they say opposites attract, but both these sets of breasts are big and bountiful, and it makes sense to us that they wanna get it on.

No, that’s not the title of a recently unearthed Philip K. Dick novel, it’s a genuine question. Nuts just put out their Naked Issue, in which lad mag girls must hide their bottom parts with clever poses and obstacles instead of underwear, and as much as we enjoy the sight of bare thighs and hip bones, we can’t help but wonder how they feel.

We’ve gotten our hands on some preview pics from Nuts Magazine’s latest issue, which promises a whopping 101 topless babes. And who is our faithful (also topless) guide? None other than Ms. Holly Peers, who’s got a set of boobs so nice they send any self-respecting top running.

God bless technology! We’re basically sold with the promise of seeing Ms. Peers’ top go flying, but Nuts’ new interactive issue also includes live action Lucy Pinder and behind the scenes videos of the gals romping around. We’re fans of all their glorious breasts in photo form, but to think

Why, look! Here’s Emma, Rhian, Holly, Lacey, Lucy, India, Rosie, and their friends ringing in every month of 2012 with a heaping helping of boobie. Each lovely lady espouses on the favorite parts of her chosen month — but our favorite parts are still those that made ‘em famous. As

Don’t look directly in her eyes! If you do, you’ll be compelled to buy her 2012 calendar and then the other lad mag girls will get jealous, come to your house, and do naughty things to you until you buy all of their calendars, too. On second though, do look

Hey, Sophie Reade! What should we get our girlfriends and wives this year? “Underwear. It’s very intimate and if you get all the sizes right, it makes you look very attentive.” Really? Maybe we should ask some of the other girls… Emma Frain, thank goodness you’re here. Do you have

Get it? Because boobs are called guns, and they’re also holding guns! We’d laugh, but the fact that we can say “guns” and you think “boobs” shows how deep rooted the military-lad mag complex is. You’ve never heard of the military-lag mag complex? It’s sinister. Eisenhower saw this kind of

Normally, Nuts magazine will take a sexy comment from a girl’s interview and pair it with an especially naughty picture, but that’s not what happened here. “I hate it when guys take photos of their cock and send them to me!” Ooh, say it slow, Sophie Howard. It might be

We all know that “Big Brother” is an excellent feeder program for the topless models of tomorrow, but sometimes it’s not enough. That’s when Holly Peers hits the street, takes the choicest chests she can find, and turns them over to Nuts. “To be a Nuts girl, you’ve got to

If you’ve ever wondered what it’s like to party with a bunch of busty, beautiful, British lad magazine babes, it’s pretty much what you expect it to be: many straws in one huge drink, bra flashing, and thong biting. We can’t help but wonder if these candid photos are actually