To every season, turn, turn, turn the channel to premium cable because those bigwigs know that even though we say we’re paying for gripping drama and exhilarating action, we’re really paying for softcore porn. Summer programming is gone, but some of our favorite shows are just heating up.

We know we just spent time praising Anna Skellern exactly three hours ago, but in the process of doing so, we realized that we don’t know anything about her. We know that she’s our favorite orgasmer on television right now, but we’re sure that there’s much more to Anna Skellern beneath the sexy and often sapphic surface.

It’s almost Memorial Day weekend and you’ve got some serious choices to make. You’re probably going to see a movie, but what kind of movie? Let’s make this easier: you’re going to see a movie with nudity in it, so all you have to do is figure out what type of nudity you’re after. That’s where this guide comes in!

Our curiosity about Emily Ratajkowski grows everyday. Why did Treats! magazine decide to release pictures of her first? What makes her so special? How did this model end up on the Nickelodeon sitcom “iCarly”? Friends, the answers may not come quickly, but they will come.

Interracial porn is a sensitive subject, but we have to talk about it because it’s important and we love it. Well, do we really love it? Would we be happier if there weren’t a separate section of the porn world that was all about big black cocks penetrating small white holes? And yes, when people talk about interracial porn as a genre, they usually mean black males partnered with white women. What’s the deal with that? God, it’s only been one paragraph and we’ve already tied ourselves in a knot.

You’re familiar with the Naked News, right? Gorgeous female news anchors read you the top stories while slowly removing everything they’re wearing. Sure it sounds simple, but it’s extremely hard to multitask in such a way–imagine trying to unhook your bra while telling people about the latest casualties in some war zone. Fortunately, now we have a guide: Naked News’s lead anchor, Victoria Sinclair!

Winter has passed, Passover and Easter are here, and people all over the northern hemisphere are leaving their homes and dancing in the streets. But, you know, you don’t have to leave the house. Heck, you’ve got windows, right? Right. So why don’t you plop back down in front of the TV and get ready for all the smutty programming that’s coming this season.

If you’re going to exact revenge on someone, you can do it two ways: clothed or naked. (Yes, those are the only two ways.) Today, we’re looking at characters who choose the latter option, not just as far as revenge goes, but for all of their poor decisions! Maybe nudity makes bad scenarios better! Maybe.

In case you’ve forgotten, the first season of “Game of Thrones” ended with Emilia Clarke completely nude in a pile of ashes, surrounded by three dragon hatchlings. We saw Daenerys Targaryen (Clarke’s character) do a lot of freaky things last season, and we often saw her naked, but that dragon scene alone is enough of a reason to obsess over and write a Field Guide about Emilia Clarke.

According to a 2007 study by the University of Bologna, feet and toes are the most fetishized body parts in the entire world, and yes, the study included breasts and butts. How the hell are feet more fetishized than anything else? More importantly, should Fleshbot become a foot-centric site in order to increase our readership? Let’s do some research before we decide.

All the college-aged folk just had a weeklong break, so why shouldn’t you? Flip off your boss, hit the beach, take your favorite book, call up some fuck buddies, just do what you have to do to change your scenery (both physical and mental). Or, if you can’t afford to do any of that, just live vicariously through these offerings from Netflix!

With all the recent hooplah surrounding the video that shows a woman who looks a lot like Tulisa Contostavlos performing oral, we haven’t had time to sit down and ask, “Who is Tulisa Contostavlos?” Well, she’s a singer, and we’ve seen her panties a number of times, but that’s all we know about her. That is, until we actually did the research.

Ah, double penetration; just seeing those two words next to each other makes our hearts flutter. For some, it’s a distant dream of ultra-hardcore mastery; for others, it’s an everyday kind of thing. We love it, and we’re happy that it starts with a D, because now we get to explore it as part of our weekly Encyclopedia of Smut post! Hooray for the alphabet!

As you’ve probably noticed, we’re super happy that Cinemax has given us a late night treat that features two (yep, two) gorgeous females on the prowl for penis. It’s called “The Girl’s Guide to Depravity,” and it stars Rebecca Blumhagen and Sally Golan. Who are these women? That’s what we’re wondering!

We’re back with yet another letter in our Encyclopedia of Smut! Today’s entry focuses on one of the most misused (or should we say oddly evolved) words in the porn lexicon: cuckoldry. What is a cuckold? Who enjoys cuckoldry? Why is there a genre of porn that draws a comparison between humiliated husbands and the egg-laying habits of birds? There are almost too many questions.

If you read this (awesome) Salon article about the treatment of transsexual pornstars–or if, you know, you ask your transsexual pornstar friends–you’ll learn that many T-girl performers felt slighted and pushed aside by the AVN Awards. It’s been a long bunch of weeks since Las Vegas, but we figured it’s never too late to give some love to the transgirl community by taking a close look at one of our favorite performers, Madison Montag.

We’re back for another letter and another niche in our Encyclopedia of Smut! This time, we’re getting in touch with BBWs: what do those three letters mean, who are the biggest names in the genre, and why is Kelly Shibari so fucking hot?

She’s African royalty. She’s got legs as long and delicious as her name. She’s made “House of Lies” our newest TV obsession. She’s frequently topless. Yeah, this is clearly a woman we need to know better, so here goes another one of our Field Guides!

It’s Valentine’s Day and it’s a Tuesday, and if you’re like us, you are probably not on the ball right now. It’s cool though! Here are some things you can pick up on the way home, or if worst comes to worst, things you can have delivered by the weekend. (Because honestly, it’s a fucking Tuesday. Can’t we just reschedule this for Saturday?)

On our way out of Las Vegas last weekend, we saw Bridgette B hanging out by the concierge of the Hard Rock Hotel and we were like, “Damn girl, you’re rocking that velour tracksuit so hard.” That’s not why we’re writing this field guide—we’re actually doing it because she won