We were already proud of Shiri Appleby for schooling her beastly boyfriend Adam in the bedroom with lines like, “I can like your cock and not be a whore.” But then we saw the full frontal self-shot that’s allegedly of Shiri Appleby, and this double whammy delivered our heart directly to her. Come, look at the photo and tell us what you think!

Could this be Shiri getting in touch with her nudity before filming her sex scenes on “Girls”? We don’t know much about the gal, but we’ve been comparing this picture to other verified (and clothed) images of her, and we have to say there’s a striking similarity between the subject of this photo and the genuine Shiri Appleby–specifically, we’re looking at the mole just beneath her clavicle and the way her smile lines are angled. We’d tell you to compare the photo to the clip above, but we’re afraid it’s a bit too dark in that scene to help you very much. No, the scene from “Girls” serves a very different purpose: showing that Adam is awful when it comes to communicating in bed, but at least he’s willing to let his lady call the shots (unlike the fucking fiasco from last week).

And we giggled our buns off when Adam said, “Whenever we have sex you get a bad case of the whispers.”

· “Girls” (hbo.com)

As far as we know, that right there is the first time a puddle of semen on a beautiful young woman’s naked chest has been shown on American television. We could be totally wrong about that though; nobody really keeps data about the number of times jizz has been on TV.

In fact, searching for any combination of the words “semen” and “television” will give you a ton of articles about how television-addicts tend to have low sperm count. However, we know for a fact that 1999 was the year British audiences first saw ejaculation. A documentary on pornography included a clip from “Behind the Green Door” in which seed is shown flying through the air and landing on Marilyn Chambers’s face in slow motion. We Americans didn’t get to see any skeet, but we do get to see the young, gorgeous, and talented Shiri Appleby with come on her chest! We praise her, not just for her bravery in the face of nudity, but for dealing with that creepy and emotionally-charged sex with Adam as well.

· “Girls” (hbo.com)

This episode of “Girls” departed from the usual quagmire of angst and absurdity to give us (and Hannah) a brief vacation at a rich doctor’s brownstone. She stayed at his place for two days of nonstop fucking, fingering, and ping pong. Then she got in his fancy steam shower, fainted, had an emotional breakdown, and everything changed.

But hey, two days of fooling around and playing ping pong topless sounds pretty fucking awesome to us. Everybody deserves a little vacation like that–maybe minus the fainting and freaking out part–and hopefully this will help Hannah figure out what she wants from life. Hopefully, she will figure out how important topless ping pong is.

· “Girls” (hbo.com)

We’re not saying (Jessa) Jemima Kirke is our favorite person on “Girls,” but she might be our favorite this week. First of all, she taunts Thomas John with her titty and later takes a bath with Hannah–that’s two whole nude scenes! Secondly, her marriage ended and we feel like we should shower her with love in her time of strife.

Of course, there’s more to “Girls” than misery and mammaries. Our beloved Shoshanna has to deal with Ray suddenly moving in with her, and even though she’s initially mortified by the idea, the two of them eventually have a cathartic emotion-revealing session in the subway during which they each confess their love for the other. We may never see Zosia Mamet naked, but she’s still the coolest character.

Oh, and here’s that bath scene. Soothing!

· “Girls” (hbo.com)

Hannah is pissed. As you may recall, Elijah (her roommate/ex-boyfriend who came out after they broke up) and Marnie (her best friend/former roommate) had sex two weeks ago, and now that Hannah’s learned about it, she’s furious with everyone. Fortunately for us, her fury prevents her from changing out of the yellow mesh top that shows her breasts. Silver linings!

We don’t really get why Hannah is so pissed (besides the whole “I was supposed to be your last” spiel she lays on Elijah), but gosh darnit, it sure is fun to watch her go supernova in that shirt. Meanwhile, poor Marnie is having a truly rough time; she has unsatisfying and creepy sex with a guy who makes her stare at and describe a lifelike doll standing by his bed.

· “Girls” (hbo.com)

As far as our records show us, Lena Dunham has been naked on camera many, many times, and she’s had sex scenes with more than a few dudes, but she’s never before had on-camera sex with a black guy. But guess what? That’s all changed–she’s fucking Donald Glover now!

Meanwhile, Marnie (Allison Williams) and Elijah get close after singing some Sarah McLachlan jams together, they end up almost having sex on the couch, and we almost were able to see those beautiful huge boobs of hers. At least we can admire her lovely panties! (Speaking of which, we think Lena’s ass looks killer in her thong.)

Anyhow, the highlight of this episode is obviously the Dunham-Glover scene, because it’s not “Girls” until you’re hyper conscious about everyone’s ethnicity.

· “Girls” (hbo.com)

Guess what’s going on this weekend? Sexy TV time! A new season of “Girls” begins this Sunday, and even if Lena Dunham doesn’t get naked this time around (and we’re betting she will), we already have confirmed nudity from Shiri Appleby in later episodes. Plus, Ivana Milicevic’s first nude scene will hit Cinemax this Friday for the premiere of their newest series, “Banshee.” Good times lie ahead!

A pop-culture writer for the Charlotte Observer notes that Ivana’s sex scene isn’t just pointless fleshiness, but actually develops the characters: “In the series pilot airing Friday night, things get hot and heavy between Miličević and on-screen husband Rus Blackwell — although her character, Carrie, actually has former flame Lucas (Starr) on the brain.”

It’s a big step for Ivana, but she took it with pride and excitement:

“I’ve never wanted to. I’ve never been inspired to. But for this, I was,” says Miličević, 38. “I was like, ‘Oh, for this, it needs to be done, and it needs to be done well. It needs to not be done with a sheet wrapped around me; it needs to be done like a husband and wife do it. … I just kind of wanted it to be natural. And I don’t really find them gratuitous because … it’s part of the story.”

· News via Upcoming Nude Scenes (upcomingnudescenes.net)

[At top: Adam's fantasies come out in the second episode of "Girls"]

Now that Hannah and Adam are dating, Hannah has to get used to a different way of being. Sometimes she gets to indulge in the cuteness and the snuggling (and in the previous episode, the floor was covered in used condoms [gross]), but sometimes she gets straight-up smothered by Adam. That’s no good, Adam. We need to see her boobs, too!

Can you believe that next week is the end of the season? HBO is renewing “Girls” for 2013, and we can’t imagine what kind of crazy cliffhanger will be thrown at us during the last bit of the finale. We’re hoping that the next episode is all about Adam and Hannah banging and then Hannah ends up pregnant…with a new idea for a book.

· “Girls” (hbo.com)

You know how those Bushwick parties go: you show up, everybody’s looking flossy, you mistake a crack pipe for pot, someone takes their top off, the topless person has really nice boobs, you can’t handle any of it, and so you leave. That’s how our last foray* into Bushwick went, and it lasted all of ten minutes.

An episode of “Girls” is slightly longer, so they had to take up time with additional drama (besides Shoshanna’s crack smoking): Hannah runs into the deplorable Adam, Jessa pisses off a couple of crusty punks, Adam asks Hannah if she wants him to be her “fucking boyfriend,” and someone says Marnie looks like one of the Real Housewives. Rough night. But hey, Rachel Lord’s breasts were a lovely reprieve from the bummers of Brooklyn!

· “Girls” (hbo.com)

* Not true, we always ask what’s in the bowl before we smoke it. Crack is wak.

We’ve been eagerly following the TV sexual progress of Girls’ “it-ain’t-an-episode-if-there-ain’t-boobs” proprietess Lena Dunham, and she’s come a long way from her first awkward anal encounter. Now she’s taking the plunge into ass-land all on her own!

Unfortunately her new lover isn’t so into that. And Hannah’s not the kind to say, “Shut up, bitch, and take it” and have her way with the man. We can’t quite imagine that scenario, but if she felt like dressing up and “playing dominatrix” that could be the ticket to shattering her bumbling sex MO. Either way, another episode, another solid peek at Lena’s all natural goods — and may she one day reach the summit of true ass-master.

· Girls (imdb.com)
· Via Upcoming Nude Scenes (upcomingnudescenes.net)

Last weekend sure brought a bountiful bunch of TV nudity, huh? Next up, we have Lena Dunham throwing her hat (and boobs) into the sexting ring! She does it in response to a random dick pic sent by her sort-of boyfriend–and sadly, he says the photo was meant for someone else–but regardless of why she does it and who it’s for, we say: you go, girl. (Do people still say that?)

Also on “Girls,” Zosia Mamet gets eaten out! Is it pleasant? No. We’re starting to think that none of the guys on “Girls” can do anything sexual in a good way. Then again, you could probably say the same about the ladies on this show (except, you know, they’re all so pretty and topless and Zosia’s boobs look great in her bra).

· “Girls” (hbo.com)

Lena Dunham has progressed in leaps and bounds from last week’s lackluster anal experiment to this dirty-talking fuck scene, and though there’s still some compulsory awkward chatting, we’re now ecstatic to follow her sex trajectory throughout the season.

At this rate she’ll be doing some full-fledged double penetration or spitroasting by the season’s end! With maybe only an occasional quip or comment on the proceedings. But even if her character’s sexual path doesn’t go the direction we hope, we must say Ms. Dunham has balls for baring her boobs and sexing up her show (two for two episodes now!). It’s enough for us to maybe ignore the mumbling for now. We do love an exhibitionist, even a chatty one.

· “Girls” (hbo.com)

Slate magazine described this moment as “The Worst Instigation of Anal Sex in the History of the World,” and we definitely agree with that assessment, but look on the bright side: at least we know Lena Dunham is down to get nude on her new show!

We had a feeling that Dunham would show some skin on “Girls,” but there’s always a chance we could be wrong. This isn’t the most erotically-charged moment on TV, but that’s the kind of hyper-real stuff we expect from her. And, even though there’s absolutely zero foreplay or warm-up, there is something hot about the marriage of realism and ignorance in a butt sex moment.

· “Girls” (hbo.com)

Ava (sexoteric.com)

Do you think Mother Nature is a MILF? Maybe her sexiness can’t be contained in one big-breasted babe, and instead it’s broken down into a team of lovely ladies. Meet the Charlie’s Angels of the forest!

Photographer Alicia J. Rose presents the perfectly titled Mossgasm, a set about three hot babes running around naked in nature. It’s kind of like watching “Princess Mononoke” except not animated, not for kids, and the forest is only important as a backdrop for naked chicks. Anyway, you should check out the whole gallery. It’s great!

· Mossgasm (flickr.com)
· Found via Indie Nudes (indienudes.com)

When it comes to lesbian action, we don’t always need full frontal nudity to turn us on. All it takes is a bit of sexy kissing and heavy breathing to get our blood (and…well, you know) pumping.

The ladies in these videos may be semi-clothed, but that doesn’t make them any less hot. Sometimes it’s more fun to guess what’s hidden underneath that sexy lingerie anyway.

Previously: Top Ten Video Archive

Two Hot teens lesbian kissing with tongue (youtube.com)

sexy brunnete kiss (youtube.com)

Hottest Women Lesbian Hardcore Fucking (youtube.com)

Girls making out! (youtube.com)

Very sexy lesbian girls on making out (youtube.com)

Stewardess Training Turns Lesbo!!! (youtube.com)

2006 two beautiful lesbians on bed (youtube.com)

Older Lesbian Lady Making Out With Her Daughter’s Friend (youtube.com)

Lesbian Girls Gone Wild On Sofa (youtube.com)

Horny Lesbian Babes Fucking Each Other Hard (youtube.com)

We love to make passes at girls who wear glasses. Behind that bookish exterior lies a kinky woman waiting to be released. If we’re having trouble finding our own geeky lady baring all, what better place to look than here?

The girls in these videos have the sexy librarian look going for them but this time instead of just wishing we could see what they’re hiding under that blouse, we get to see them taking it all off. Except the glasses, of course.

Nerd Sex is the Best (pornhub.com)

My Debut! (xtube.com)

Short-Haired Blondie Gives a Tight BJ with Glasses (pornhub.com)

Tattooed Geek Reamed From Behind (pornhub.com)

Petite blonde qui suce (yuvutu.com)

20 mins into meeting (yuvutu.com)

suck (xtube.com)

great blowjob cum on glasses (yuvutu.com)

Perfect brest woman4 (yuvutu.com)

Cute brunette glasses incomplete (xnxx.com)

*****

Previously: Top Ten Video Archive

We now interrupt the regularly scheduled hardcore pornography for something a little softer… These girls show us that they don’t have to bare it all to get our blood pumping. Sexy music and sexier underwear is all we need.

YouTube: It’s not just for laughs anymore.

SEXY Blondes dancing & kissing (youtube.com)

Nena SEXY dance (youtube.com)

OMG SEXY GIRL DANCING (youtube.com)

The Best Damn Sexy Girl Booty Dance Video Period! “Belladonna” MegaMix pt. 2 (youtube.com)

take a look at my girlfriend (youtube.com)

sexy webcam strip tease (youtube.com)

Video of my girlfriend on webcam (youtube.com)

Sexy Dancing Blond Girl (youtube.com)

Ultra sexy webcam dance (porn and sex hot cam ) (youtube.com)

hot body babe webcam dance sexy (youtube.com)

Cracked performs a much needed scientific study to determine which of the popular female names bring you the most nudity when plugged into Google Image Search. These are the questions of our age and we must have answers. (cracked.com)