Hey, you’re not too attached to the cherished images from your childhood, are you? Because if you are, these hypersexualized comic-style renditions of your favorite Disney princesses are going to blow your mind (or, at the very least, add a distinctly naughty flavor to your Disney memories). We don’t know

We sure hope the Jamieson’s Beer people have sold some beer, because Disney now wants their heart cut out and put in a box. The Foundry, the advertising agency that skankified the classic character, said they “challenged the consumer’s notion of what this beer was,” and we couldn’t agree with

You just can’t take grandpa anywhere anymore. And by “grandpa,” we don’t mean Ryan Seacrest. Fooled you for a second, right? Apparently, a 60-year-old man was arrested, brought to trial and found guilty of goosing Minnie Mouse at Disney World. Yes, with his grandkids watching, he grabbed Minnie’s titties right

After a decade of keeping vigilant watch, Disney will no longer be scanning its theme park rides for topless women. And just in time for our massive Space Mountain “flash” mob. Who’s in? · Disney stops looking for breasts after a decade of trying (gadling.com) · Thumbnail via Flash Mountain

Mackenzee Pierce‘s Myspace page says she’s only moments away from going to Disneyland and “getting fucked up legally!!!!” and her mood is Jubilant. If you hadn’t guessed, she turns 21 today. Aside from the possibility that the kind of up she is talking about getting fucked might not be legal

We have no idea who this “Cheetah Girl” Adrienne Bailon is (apparently she’s somehow affiliated with Disney?), but the fact that she’s currently embroiled in a leaked (sorta) dirty pictures scandal–and is pretty hot–is enough to pique our interest. We have to wonder, though: is there some manual out there

Pervs that we are, even we can’t see what the brouhaha is over that reasonably tasteful “nude” photo of Miley Cyrus by Annie Leibovitz in the new Vanity Fair that seems to have certain Disney executives’ panties in a bunch. Wait a few years until she starts swapping nude cellphone

What kind of twisted mind puts on a production of “Nemo On Ice” complete with fish cameltoe and googly-eyed breasts? It’s like Disney is now making and destroying your childhood memories all at the same time. (meta-mirror.com)

We see a lot of filthy, filthy stuff in our daily travels, but somehow nothing makes us feel dirtier than watching Fred cheat on Wilma with Betty Rubble. Or a Simpsons family gangbang. Or even some man-on-Spiderman fan fic. Even sweet little Kim Possible can’t escape the clutches of pervy

We don’t remember much about that Introduction to Philosophy course we took in college, but watching naked cartoon characters fuck while quoting Wittgenstein is making us want to dip into our textbook again. Suddenly, it’s all starting to make sense. (happyfamousartists.com, via Otomano)

· She might have barely cracked the top 60 in this hemisphere, but Keeley Hazell is at least still the sexiest woman in the world according to FHM’s Austalian readers. Which proves that Australia is even more sensible than we may have given them credit for. (brisbanetimes.com.au, via hollywoodtuna.com) ·

· Lindsay Lohan doesn’t need a shirt to party hard. All those pesky buttons and sleeves just weigh you down. (egotastic.com + hollywoodtuna.com) · Someone at the New York Times has spent a lot of time thinking about duck penises. We’re glad somebody does. (nytimes.com) · For once, we’re glad

Of the dozens of special features that have helped make Disney’s “Pirates of the Caribbean: Dead Man’s Chest” DVD one of the best selling titles of the past year, footage of a hardcore threeway starring Keira Knightley getting DP’d by Johnny Depp and Orlando Bloom isn’t one of them. Which

· The paparazzi catch another thong-wearing starlet letting it all hang out. Wait … that’s Jodie Foster? Wow, we actually feel a little bit dirty now. (taxidrivermovie.com) · Congrats to Elizabeth Hurley, who married Indian businessman Arun Nayar this weekend in a private ceremony. Based on this collection of not-so-private

Lusting after the animated babes in Disney’s feature films is one thing, but for some folks simply admiring their well-drawn lines in the theater isn’t enough. For if the internet has taught us anything, it’s that if someone creates a popular fantasy character, someone else is definitely going to incorporate

· Vida Guerra has an early Christkwaanzukkah present for fans of her ass—an FHM cover shoot. You didn’t even have to unwrap it. (fhmus.com) · Congratulations to Britney Spears for going an entire day without letting anyone photograph her cooch. (Maybe. The day isn’t over yet.) (chicagotribune.com) · Meanwhile, you

· We are fairly certain that this shot of a boob-baring Christina Aguilera being groped by someone in a Donald Duck costume making the rounds this week is a Photoshop job. Then again, considering what goes on at Disney theme parks these days, we suppose anything’s possible. (break.com – thanks

Since this already notorious video disappeared from YouTube earlier today almost as quickly as we discovered it, we’ll start by saying that if you want your chance to catch Minnie, Mickey, Goofy and the rest of the gang in some hot-and-heavy cosplay orgy action at Disneyland Paris, you’d better click