We know you have places to go and stuff to do, but if you could just slow it down for a moment, you’d feel right as rain. Instead of running around and scrubbing like a maniac in your shower, you should sit down and sensually pour water all over your bod. You’ll feel like a goddess!

Michael Donovan’s mysterious, atmospheric photography is already doing a lot for Sheila Marquez’s lovely skin, but the addition of paint to the prints truly enhances the artistic quality of the shots, even if it covers a couple of potentially exposed nipples. We haven’t seen Sheila naked since May, and we

So the Beijing government thinks it can prevent citizens from using Twitter, huh? Well, the beautiful and charming Japanese AV idol Sola Aoi has (unintentionally) motivated thousands of her Chinese fans to jump over the Great Firewall. Yes, Sola Aoi (whom you might remember from “Erotic Ghost: Siren”) is the

Truth be told, this is no video. This is Durex’s tribute to the sweet and strange sounds of success. Why would Durex use this advertisement to sell condoms in China? We’re not sure. Maybe they’re trying to embed subliminal links between condom use and multiple orgasms. Or, more realistically, they’re

If you thought the Victoria’s Secret Miraculous Push-up Bra was the hot new titty tamer on the market, then you should check this out. It’s God’s Hand on your breasts. When it comes down to it, you have a choice: you can either have a push-up bra that claws at

Over the years, porn has gone through many technical innovations—the internet! HD porn! Mobile porn!—so we’re half surprised to learn that it’s taken this long to see the launch of 3D porn. Seriously, 3D porn? Isn’t that something that should have been done back in the fifties, when 3D technologically

Internet giant Google China issues formal apology for being too slow, in the Chinese government’s estimation, to remove all links to porn sites from its search engine. The crackdown on websites that are “threatening morals by spreading pornography and vulgarity” continues in China, targeting sites like Baidu, Google and Sina.com.

Xiao Yun may have set some pulses racing with her scantily clad fundraising, but Kappa Girl—the latest sex scandal to emerge from the People’s Republic—puts the budding philanthropist to shame with her honest-to-goodness sex tape. It all started about a month and a half ago, when a twelve minute long

We just found out that next weekend is the fifth annual China Adult-Care Expo–which sounds kinda boring until you realize that “Adult-Care” actually means “sex toys.” Who cares about that whole Olympics thing anyway? And anyone have an extra ticket to Shanghai they want to share with us? (shanghaiist.com)

A few weeks ago we told you the story of a young Chinese woman who started posting scantily clad pictures of herself online to raise money for earthquake relief. Well, it seems that Xiao Yun’s charitable work has garnered more attention than she originally intended, or at least a different

A young Chinese woman is posting scantily clad photos of herself online in the hopes of raising money for earthquake relief. We hope she’s more successful with her fundraiser than those Spanish moms were… (chinashuo.com + ananova.com)

Chinese officials shut down a local lifestyle magazine that published pictures of sexy models in their underwear … posing in the rubble of the earthquake that has killed over 40,000 people. Even a tentacle porn director was quoted as saying, “Dude, that’s just not right.” (news24.com, via Gawker)

In a story ripped from our hottest secret fantasies an Orwellian nightmare, surveillance cameras in China were apparently used to spy on young women as they disrobed and walked around their homes naked. We’ve included the clip as a friendly reminder to our readers: if you live in a big

Forget combining porn and video games–we want to see more people combine porn and kung fu movies! Really, it’s a natural combination: both porn actors and kung fu stars can get pretty acrobatic with their special moves and fancy abilities, and you wouldn’t have to worry about any of that

The panda porn apparently didn’t work, so animal handlers in China have developed a “sexercise” program to try and get the little guys to get busy. Hey, if they can’t get in the mood after watching porn made specifically for them, maybe those bears just want to be left alone

China is very serious about censorship and keeping prurient material out of the hands of it citizens. Those crazy foreigners who are all coming to Beijing this summer for the Olympics, however, can have all the Playboys they want. (machochip.com)

China has shut down another “real-time” porn site (which we guess means there was a webcam on it somewhere), thus adding to the 44,000 (!) sites shut down and the 868 people who were arrested last year in their continued internet crackdown. But hey, how about those Olympics? Those should

Despite being the No. 1 search almost everywhere else, “sex” is Googled less frequently in China than “stocks” and other banking terms, which probably has nothing to do with the fact that government censors watch over every internet user like disapproving hound dogs. Nope, nothing to see here. (chinadaily.com.cn)

China has graciously agreed that any woman caught carrying condoms is not a dirty, dirty whore and will no longer need to be arrested. They may still be whores, but at least they’re not as dirty. (inquirer.net)

Chinese officials are warning people to not download the uncensored version of Ang Lee’s NC-17 smutfest dramatic thriller “Lust,Caution,” in part because the sexual positions shown in the film are too dangerous to be attempted by mere mortal humans. Oh, so that’s how Brokeback Mountain got its name. (reuters.com)