I would just like to state, right away, that if you burn yourself to a crisp deep-frying your turkey on Thanksgiving, your nurses will probably not be as hot as the ones in “Big Breast Nurses 5.” So don’t go getting any ideas from this. “Big Breast Nurses 5″ is

Get it? Because boobs are called guns, and they’re also holding guns! We’d laugh, but the fact that we can say “guns” and you think “boobs” shows how deep rooted the military-lad mag complex is. You’ve never heard of the military-lag mag complex? It’s sinister. Eisenhower saw this kind of

We all know that “Big Brother” is an excellent feeder program for the topless models of tomorrow, but sometimes it’s not enough. That’s when Holly Peers hits the street, takes the choicest chests she can find, and turns them over to Nuts. “To be a Nuts girl, you’ve got to

Lad magazines frequently announce “The Best Boobs In Britain” belong to this girl or that, but we have no idea what contributes to the bestowing of such a superlative! Now that Sammy Braddy’s dynamic duo has once again been dubbed the finest in the land, we’re going to look at

We’re pretty sure that this woman’s cleavage isn’t craving fruit juice, but you know, maybe we’re just narrow-minded. Maybe her tits are on a grapefruit diet! Can you get melon sized tits from a grapefruit diet? We’re investigating. Also, this somehow sells shoes. The company, Primitive Shoes, knows exactly what

It would be criminal—simply abhorrent—for Mike Adriano not to bite Ava Addams’s huge tits. For one, it’s a fun way to test the relative squishiness. Second, Ava really likes to have her breasts nibbled. So not biting them would disappoint everybody. It’d be like if Mike didn’t get to stick

Why do lad mags demand so much from their models? Look here: you can see Emma Glover shift her center of gravity in order to lift Sophie’s neutron star-sized boob. Is her struggle supposed to excite us? (It kind of does.) But that doesn’t mean we’re sadists or anything like

Kelly Shibari pledged to give out free blowjobs if Japan won the FIFA Women’s World Cup. Guess what? Japan won, Kelly is preparing for a huge bukkake, and it’s going to be awesome. Eat your heart out, Larissa Riquelme. The Japanese-American performer was asked why she supported Japan over the

Since Google+ is the new hotness, Facebook is going to have to do something drastic to look cool. ZOO Magazine has a nifty idea: get rid of everyone on Facebook who isn’t a busty party girl/lad mag model! Today’s Facebook Fittie is Louise Gwyther, a lovely Londoner with 32DD breasts

This video, entitled “Busty tomboy gives a cockjob,” delivers exactly what it says. We don’t know what that is, but we definitely feel that we have been delivered something via a girl who is androgynous with huge tits and a great smile. We suspect a cockjob is something like a

Lindsey Strutt is a working woman; she’s had a hard week, she’s exhausted, and even though it’s Friday, she knows she still has to look sexy on camera a little bit longer. Hang in there, baby. We believe in you! At least she doesn’t have to wear anything too elaborate—just

Normally we’re joking about comparisons like that, but we’re serious this time. Humphrey Bogart has been replaced with Pamela Anderson (then Lee). It’s for the best though; he didn’t look so good covered in suds. Even though most of us are gearing up for Independence Day weekend, we can’t forget

But what is it? A big ass fixation? (We’re certain he still has that one.) A big penis? The ability to jizz on command? The love of legions of young pornstars? A better life than we could possibly imagine? Whatever it is, it looks real good on him. Incidentally, Samone

This is titfucking done right, and we’re not just talking about the oil, the outfit, or the resolution. We’re talking about the way the sun bounces off this woman’s perfect shelf of breast and lights up the room quicker than a smile ever could. But we can’t forget about the

Sometimes the lad mags like to rank the babes within their pages, and sometimes they just throw a whole smorgasbord out and the numbers are arbitrary. This is one of the latter cases; these big breasted ladies are all equals. Perhaps, by featuring such an even smattering of celebrities and

The nerve of some people! The beginning of this article starts with a little discussion about how “the Yanks gave us fast food” but because Britain contains an infinite amount of boobage, they are superior. Hmph! We’re taking our McDonald’s back then. Because we’re simply not in the mood to

No one in film school took Natasha Nice’s big boobs seriously, so she and her busty friends dropped out to make their own movie! It would’ve worked if only the entire world weren’t obsessed with large tits. Sadly, it doesn’t matter that Natasha’s script is better written than “The King’s

We know we just went on about how big boobs are a menace to bras everywhere, but we have to admire the versatility of these tits. This woman can give a titfucking with only the bottom third of her boobs! But these boobs provide more than a new way to

How can you just sit there, looking at porn, letting these poor bras get abused, explode, and left in tatters by the side of the bed while the former bra-wearers celebrate their bustiness with titfucking and threesomes? Wait, that probably answers everything. While we wait for Victoria’s Secret to get

We love hearing what lad mag babes think about the world, but Sabine J recently said, “British girls are sexier. The models here all seem so intelligent.” Hey, just because you have 32F boobs doesn’t mean you can talk smack. (Ok, it sort of does.) Also, she has a long