We may not all be shareholders of Tumblr (drat!), but these babes have us feelin’ pretty rich.
What’s a Sienna Miller? It’s a pair of boobs lying back on the bed. Don’t you know from poker? It’s definitely a rare hand–the last time we encountered Sienna was two years ago–but it’s an unforgettable one and powerful to boot! Them tits bring the chips.
We normally turn to them as bastions of goodness and truth, gentle beacons lighting our path through the murky woods of life. But sometimes we turn to them for their MILFy tits and questionable taste in fuck-dudes, and hey, that’s cool too. Because a doggystyle MILF-bang is illuminating in its own right.
We’re sure we’ve got plenty to help pick you up here.
We’re not sure if it’s medically validated, but we’re pretty sure facials are great for your health. They’re great for skin, they elevate seratonin levels, and they strengthen tooth enamel (hence the importance of the smile). But, uh, okay. In reality these likely factoids aren’t 100% true. But that doesn’t really matter to us! Because they make us feel good, that’s all.
We were fans of the series as is, but if things had taken such sexy turns while we were reading we would have snuck out the flashlight and read all night. This blonde biddie has taken things to the next level, getting a friend involved to live out the plot in all its smutty detail. Awesomely, the tale revolves around a lot of cunnilingus and bangin’.
Well, we probably love your smile too, but that’s not what’s really being showcased here. So we’ll just admire what’s right in front of our faces — and that’s one stellar handie. Oh okay, and also a pretty phenomenal pair of tits, but we can only focus on one thing at a time! And this hottie uncut cock splooging all over the hand that jacks it has sort of got our attention right now… We just need a minute.
We’ve sometimes wonder how those gals (and dudes) manage to maintain all those smiles miles up high, trapped in a flying can filled with a buncha jerks. Well, looks like it’s because, deep within the recesses of their top secret airport lounge, there’s plenty of ways to let loose. Any residual flight-time anger can be released through BDSM-therapy — one of the most effective means of positive relaxation there is. So, next time your stewardess passes you your thrice-warmed-over chicken dinner, have a little appreciation. Just don’t let her see…
Remember yesterday when we were talking about having a lady read hot erotica to you? Guess who upped the ante? Woodrocket did! They got one of our favorite pornstars, Aiden Starr, to read from “Five Stages of Grief” with her boobs out. Her voice is arousing without the visuals, but damn, the visuals are exquisite.
It might seem like an equation that doesn’t add up, but believe you me, sluts defy all logic and make it work. That’s the great thing about ‘em… Where there’s a slut there’s a way. In addition to their science-defying dexterity, they’re also great at 69ing and BJs. What’s not to love?
You know how it is — work’s boring, love is meh, you’re feeling kind of down about life in general. Extra vulnerable. You’re lying in bed feeling sorry for yourself when — what’s that? Superman? No; better. It’s a double dose of MILFy BJ-babe! They’ll turn that frown upside down (and give you a huge boner, too).
There are lots of things people say about blondes, but we can take or leave all that jazz. To us, flowing blonde tresses make us think of fairytale princesses with dragons for neighbors, beautiful and dainty as a butterfly, stuck up in their castle towers sighing out the window. We think it the happiest ending when Prince Charming comes — and then comes all over them. Now there’s a bedtime story!
A luxurious hottub teeming with beautiful babes whacking off in turn — is this heaven? Perhaps. And hey, it’s Friday, so we may as well besmirch the name of a charitable drive all for the love of lesbians. It’s not like we’re a stranger to besmirching, as it were. And when it comes down to it, we think a Toys for Twats initiative would be pretty successful…
Why, there’s so much pussy-licking, dick-blowing, cowgirl-bangin’ action here we’d think it would necessitate one of those 2-tape set dealios (hey, Titanic!). But somehow Jane Milo’s giant tits and slutty ways manage to be captured within the magnetic tape confines of the medium. We think we need to break out the Betamax and Laserdiscs, though, just in case… We mean, she’s basically oozing sultry all over the place. And we don’t wanna miss a drop!
No STDs! Then again, you could consider insanity an STD in this case, so maybe we won’t count that one. At least ghosts are always creative in their sexual encounters. Take this young (appearing) lady for example: she appeared once in a nightclub, again tied up on the side of the road, and when she screws you, you have visions of Rene Magritte’s paintings!