We consider ourselves to have a pretty passionate love of food, but even we’d rather feast on babes than a cake.

So as you may be able to tell, I’m on a “good sex” kick today, having started the morning out with talking to you about my love for yoga and showing you how you can incorporate it into your lives, sex and otherwise. To round out this healthy day, I thought I’d share with you another of my passions, good food.

Nothing has really rivaled the unbridled thrill of rushing downstairs on a Christmas morn to find a passel of shining gifts beneath the tree. Although we don’t really get to experience that particular joy anymore, there’s no reason we can’t recreate the feeling for our vaginas.

Here it is folks, as promised, your very own mini tutorial of yoga for sex! As a yoga instructor, my favorite thing to do is teach yoga that is applicable and can be used to make our lives better. Personally, I have always thought that yoga and sex go hand in hand and I am a walking, talking testament to the fact that yoga can improve your sex life as it has certainly improved mine, both personally and professionally.

Stormy Leather, photo by Ellen Stagg

We find that some of the most titillating parts of pornography lie in the lavishing of a little nip-love. It’s like how ice cream is great, but with a cherry on top? It’s even better. And it just so happens that nipples are the luscious maraschinos on the decadent ice cream sundae that is a great pair of tits. Yeah. And the best part is that you can lick to your heart’s content and they’ll still be there when you come back for seconds.

This Australian fashion model/socialite/businessperson/television personality recently got her very own reality show, so while she’s comfortable hanging in the public spotlight, she could use a little leg-up on how to deal with cameras being in her face 24/7. What better way to adjust than to jam a camera up against her bare breasts? Well played, Lara.

We do not hold it against the lovely Molly Bennett that she apparently can’t play a goddamned note on that piano.

Advances in animation technology in America only manifest themselves in high-end movies aimed at youngsters (and the young at heart), but in Japan, they’ve been busy taking hentai to a whole new level. This is Umemaro 3D: we don’t know exactly where it came from or who started doing it, but now we have enormous-breasted babes begging us to ejaculate more. We’re pretty excited about this.

…And another one to add to our ever-growing collection of unique and wonderful O-tones. Being that this is an extra-long (for web purposes) fuck flick, we really have time to savor its dramatic structure: BJ introduction, ass-centric/cowgirl rising action, clamorous climax, and powering down denouement.

Some people say that children are the future, and we heartily disagree with them. Barely legal belles who dress up in Catholic schoolgirl uniforms are the future, for they remind us that life is about learning, and even when you’re done with formal schooling, you’re constantly taking in new information and growing as a person. Step one for growing as a person: put on a schoolgirl uniform.

Hello to everyone on this Happy Humpday! We are smack dab in the middle of our week together and I think this calls for something special, no? I’ve had a few people tweet me and send me emails, commenting on my posts thus far and making some special requests for things they would like to see and read. A popular request has been for me to talk about my love of and involvement with yoga.

Hot tip: if you want to find some fascinating yet dirty movies on Netflix, look around the biographical drama section, especially at the films about musicians, painters, writers, and other artsy folk. You’ll never appreciate the raw talent of a famous figure as much as you will when you watch them use that talent to sleep with gorgeous babes. Today, we offer the stories of a couple of artists whose works inspired great love in the world, and whose biopics inspired great stirrings in our pants.

I had said the first thing I would want to do was to share a drink with you, to have a conversation, to get to know you.

But I take it back.

I don’t want to hear your (normal speaking) voice until after I have splattered the back of your throat with my cum, until after I have felt my balls slap against your ass as I pound my cock into you, until after I have tasted your cunt, spread your thighs wide, heard you beg me to stop. Maybe twice.

Maybe the trope of the slutty/edgy/American princess Barbie doll is a bit overdone, but we don’t care. This video by Ellen von Unwerth and Vs. magazine is simply too fun and too sexy to object to. Plastic guys and gals getting drunk, fighting cops, and taking off their clothing? Yes, please, forever.

If you think Miranda Kerr’s breasts are too perky for her top, then you should take a look at her knees. She’s busting out all over! We only wish we had a video of her walking around like this, that we might see what this angular angel looks like as she billows her way down the street.

You know what they say when you reach that certain stretch of land where the hills roll just so, the grass is of an inordinate softness, and the shade of trees provides quaintly dappled coverage overhead — “that’s fuckin’ country.” This retro roll carries us to that halcyon ground with OG French fuckstress Brigitte Lahaie. Bonus: voyeuristic horses(?).

We don’t care how well you did in your Defense Against the Dark Arts class, when Nicole Trunfio casts a spell, you’re going to feel it. Most of her incantations seem to affect the general groin area, which is not a very big deal, but we thought we should warn you.