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Almost, Cara Delevingne’s Nipple, Almost

Ottimo Massimo — Fri, 17 May 2013 19:30:29 +0000

The time was right, Cara Delevingne. It's nighttime, you're with a posse, you're moving through a crowd, the photographer has the sharp angle on your cleavage, and your nipple would be right there except for the pasties on your boob. Almost, Cara. Almost.

What A Lovely Way To Show Your Panties, Courtney Stodden

Ottimo Massimo — Fri, 17 May 2013 16:30:11 +0000

Honestly, the composition of this image is just so captivating! It feels like it's missing a little something, but it's eerie and the way the light plays over her hair and dress and skin is damn moody. And then: panties! Win-win, nahmean?

The Encyclopedia Of Smut: T Is For Tickling

Ottimo Massimo — Thu, 16 May 2013 23:00:36 +0000

Charles Darwin theorized that the mirth and giggling associated with tickling is provoked by the anticipation of pleasure, but for millions of people, tickling is the main course of carnal delights. Today we're taking a look at all the magical things that can be done with fingertips and feathers, and how such a simple, universal act works in the realm of sex.

Nakedme Nixes Their Knickers For London

Ottimo Massimo — Tue, 14 May 2013 20:30:44 +0000

Sam Hatfield and Fiona Skelton, the socially disruptive duo behind Nakedme (who recently went nude on the Schwebebahn), are continuing their international tour of nakedness with a trip to London, and they've made a darling little video showcasing their nude antics around such landmarks as Buckingham Palace, Tower Bridge, the London Eye, and Abbey Road! If only we could see them from the CCTV footage that surely captured their movements.

Your Skirt Is Falling Apart, Vanessa Hudgens

Ottimo Massimo — Mon, 13 May 2013 16:30:13 +0000

We dig the vibe you're going for here, Vanessa. We're not sure if this is your all-around steez now, how you dress for all concerts, or merely how you dress to see the Rolling Stones, but this look works for you in a lot of ways. The skirt, however, doesn't seem to function properly. Unless we don't understand how skirts are supposed to work.

What’s Got Zoe Saldana So Excited?

Ottimo Massimo — Fri, 10 May 2013 16:30:43 +0000

There are a lot of reasons why her nipples might be erect, but the fact that she's blasting some pokies and biting her lip at the same time means that something real is going on, something perhaps in her field of vision, and dear God we want to know what it is! (We want to be whatever it is!)

The Encyclopedia Of Smut: S Is For Solo (Or Not So Solo)

Ottimo Massimo — Thu, 09 May 2013 23:00:40 +0000

Hell to the yes, folks, it's May, and you know what that means: it's National Masturbation Month! We know you don't want to constrict your self-loving to thirty-one days, and we don't want you to; all we're asking is that you think about masturbation really hard this month. Think to the point where masturbation loses all meaning and you have to build your wanking routine up from the ground!

Cobblestones + Heels = Helen Lasichanh’s Boob Slip

Ottimo Massimo — Thu, 09 May 2013 18:30:03 +0000

Helen is Pharrel Williams's fiancee--we didn't know he was engaged, so congrats to them! Anyhow, it seems like a combination of high heels on slippery cobblestones caused Helen to trip; Pharrel helped her keep her balance, and the bodyguard helped, but we're pretty sure the bodyguard also caused her top to come loose and thus reveal her breast. The road to boob slips is paved with good intentions! Also cobblestones!

We’re Threatened By Your Panties, Sarah Jessica Parker

Ottimo Massimo — Thu, 09 May 2013 16:30:44 +0000

It seems Abbey Lee Kershaw wasn't the only one keeping it punk at the recent Met Gala. Sarah Jessica Parker went all out with a mohawk-style crest, a huge gown, plaid boots, and well, her panties.

No Bra For Beauty Pageant Princess Olivia Culpo

Ottimo Massimo — Wed, 08 May 2013 16:30:14 +0000

She won Miss Rhode Island, Miss USA, and Miss Universe in 2012--we think Olivia Culpo has evolved beyond bras, and we also think she looks a bit like Shannyn Sossamon, which is a total turn-on for us.

Brava On Your Translucent Bra, Jessica Alba

Ottimo Massimo — Tue, 07 May 2013 20:30:25 +0000

It's that time of the year when everybody is dressing in layers because the light and warmth change drastically from block to block. Some layers are a little stuffier than others; some layers are much more revealing than others. Fortunately for the people of New York, one of Jessica Alba's layers is a sheer bra no darker than thin obsidian.

Olivia Munn Is Munificent With Her Nips

Ottimo Massimo — Tue, 07 May 2013 16:30:56 +0000

Is it just our imagination, or does this picture look straight out of the '90s? This could easily be a picture of Olivia Munn leaving a Third Eye Blind concert (if it weren't for the smartphones in each hand). Regardless, we love that mesh number she's wearing, and we thank her dearly for not wearing a bra with it. Nipple ahoy!

What Color Are Your Panties, Julianne Hough?

Ottimo Massimo — Mon, 06 May 2013 16:30:42 +0000

What do we know about Julianne Hough? We know that she keeps her smut well hidden; she was hacked by the Anonymous offshoot dedicated to digging through celebrity dirt, and all that came out were some cleavage-rich pics. We also know she used to date Ryan Seacrest, and she supported Romney in the last election. And now we know she has nice panties!

These Nippley Miley Cyrus Outtakes Sure Came Quickly

Ottimo Massimo — Fri, 03 May 2013 16:30:52 +0000

It took a few years to see the revealing outtakes from Lady Gaga’s V Magazine shoot, and the same can be said of Jennifer Lopez’s outtakes, but Miley’s outtakes showed up like bam, like fresh out the grease! Does that mean Miley Cyrus is a bigger celebrity than Gaga or

The Encyclopedia Of Smut: R Is For Reality Porn

Ottimo Massimo — Thu, 02 May 2013 23:00:22 +0000

Every time we bring up the word "real" in relation to porn, we get bogged down in authenticity vs. replication and eventually land in the kind of confusion produced by watching "The Matrix" trilogy. That won't happen here. Reality porn is essentially more gonzo, not in the arena of hardcore acts, but in the portrayal of and appeal to what actually happens in the world. It's porn that could happen to you (although it actually can't)!

Did Amanda Bynes Tweet A Little Nip To Her Fans?

Ottimo Massimo — Thu, 02 May 2013 16:30:53 +0000

We apologize for being the bearers of bad gossip, but a recent storm of Twitpics prompted Kim Kardashian's ex-publicist to ask the police (via Twitter, of course) to check on Amanda because he was worried about her. Then Jenny McCarthy chimed in. A few minutes ago, Amanda wrote a few nasty comments back at Jenny. We don't understand what the big deal is--besides Amanda's big boobs and a hint of nipple peeking out of her hair.

Francesca Eastwood’s Nipples Make Us Go Long

Ottimo Massimo — Wed, 01 May 2013 16:30:43 +0000

Our first introduction to Francesca Eastwood came with Coachella and all the cutoffs being worn there. This is only our second time seeing here, and so far, we've only seen her wearing string bikinis over her tiny titties. We approve of this trend, and we desperately hope she continues it, and we would love to toss the football around with her.

Holland Roden And The Dramatic Nipslip

Ottimo Massimo — Tue, 30 Apr 2013 16:30:29 +0000

Every nipslip is its own story. We don't know all the fine details of Holland Roden's slip, but we know that it's part of a very moody modern day noir, probably one that involves a city where it never stops raining and the police are in the pockets of mobsters. Our heroic detective sees Holland's nipple through the wet window and suddenly the whole case becomes clear.

No Time For Clothes? Just Write Them On

Ottimo Massimo — Mon, 29 Apr 2013 19:30:26 +0000

Swiss-born artist Milo Moire decided to shake up the morning commute for a few lucky folk by sending a gorgeous model on public transportation wearing nothing but glasses, a purse, and the names of clothing pieces spelled out across her body. "The same way every day to work on the tram," writes Moire. "It's early... Much too early for performance art!" We're sure people won't mind performance art like this.

Aubrey O’Day’s Bethonged Ass Vs. The Lakers

Ottimo Massimo — Mon, 29 Apr 2013 18:30:39 +0000

Her butt might not be able to dribble, but it sure makes us drool! "The things Ill do to get my mans attention when the Lakers r playing..." writes Aubrey. At first glance, we thought she was walking around in a thong just to distract her man from the TV, but maybe her butt somehow caused the Spurs to win last night's game. Who can say?