While we can’t condone Samantha Ryan reading bored, boobalicious girlfriend Sarah Blake’s diary, we do respect that the lithe performer strapped one on in order to keep her bouncy BFF at home. Sarah Blake, her toes perfectly pointed despite nearly busting out of her flimsy blouse, scrawls anguished notes in

“Let me lick the sweat off your balls,” Beverly Hills tells us. “You’ve been working all day.” Along with the Hemingwavian title “Look At Me, Whore,” this POV offering really appeals to underappreciated honest, hardworking men like us. I like point-of-view porn movies in which the guy standing in for

If it were a boxing match (and it is) the media savvy and attention-hungry AIDS Healthcare Foundation (AHF) would have won the round. In a week that not only saw HIV-positive (former?) adult performer Derrick Burts deliver several blows to the administrative competence of Adult Industry Medical Healthcare Foundation (AIM),

We don’t hate sassy blonde Jessie Andrews for being so culturally insensitive to Brit study partner Danny Mountain, forgetting both his name and country of origin. Why? Because when he takes his dick out, she sucks it. Perhaps we can learn something of the ways of hot girls who invite

Kudos to Pink Visual for making us forget that the “couples” in their scenes are professional porn actors. The solid backstories the performers incorporate are so convincing that I almost thought the wives mightn’t end up covered in jizz! “She’s hot and he’s a cutie,” says Kylie Ireland of Jada

Maybe Sindee isn’t really married. Maybe she looks supremely nervous. Maybe Jason, her scene partner, looks more nervous still. This matters little as we watch the glorious porn tapestry unravel yet again in a seedy office. Onward, pioneers! For every slick Wicked title there needs to be hundreds of low-budget

Bobbi Starr is reading the palm of a black dude. And, like all of that carnival flim-flam, she is making it up to suit her purposes. “I see a really horny white girl,” she says. It takes all of our Protestant Work Ethic and Expensive But Wasted Liberal Arts Education

Had Sabrina Deep just fucked one guy a day since late September, she would have just finished fucking the number of guys she took on in her one-day, eight-hour “Fan Bang.” But her vagina doesn’t rest on its laurels. It is a testament to the efficiency of porn during wartime

“Gloryhole” has always had a tent-revival ring to it for me, so I turned in my hour of need to Bree Olson getting baptized through a small, duct-taped aperture. Mysterious Ways, indeed. But was it good for her, too? “It’s pretty fucking filthy, actually,” says Bree Olson of the bookstore

The central logistical flaw of “This Isn’t the Biggest Loser XXX” is that each of the heavier “Before” women (Blaze, Hooterz, and Shibari) are already having sex with men they seem to like, so what’s their motivation to get skinny? This Isn’t The Biggest Loser XXX Studio: Devil’s Films Director:

Sometimes we lose touch with porn series after a few years, but we must remind ourselves, like Don Covay, to check in on our favorite sassy blackwives from Baldwin Hills, especially if they are Nyomi Banxxx and Imani Rose. We admit that we just chilled until this next episode, the

Getting ready to make a Norman Hole here at our temporary headquarters at Fleshbot Southwest, we can’t help thinking of some of our favorite images of foodlike debauchery, where all we wanted to do was stuff things in our mouth… Topping our story is the (literally!) green room of Hustler’s

AVN, a venerable publication dedicated to the furtherance of the pornographic arts, has released the 5,000 nominations for its 2011 awards earlier than expected, leaving Porn Valley to exult or to stew in its giblets a little longer, depending. When I worked at AVN and was in charge of posting

Disney’s 80′s-era “Tron,” like home rocketry and crazy girlfriends, was so much better, let’s face it, in theory than execution. As always, pornography seeks to rectify that. Co-directed by Sam “Sex Files” Hain and Canadian parodeur Lee Roy Myers, the porn “Tron” mixes both the original and this year’s remake,

In the porn version of cutesy and vaguely-disturbing Japanimation “Sailor Moon” (directed by Fleshbot hero Lee Roy Myers), producers combine magical incantations with an interactive menu, so that viewers can choose what our various planet-based heroines do to themselves. “The Japanese version of ‘Sailor Moon’ is super dorky,” said Asa

Michael Ninn directs his all-sex movies like Hieronymus Bosch staged his paintings; on the surface they seem like all hell’s breaking loose, but they are actually tautly-controlled scenes of heightened reality. Neo-Pornographia 2 Director: Michael Ninn Starring: Nicki Hunter, Jayna Oso, Manuel Ferrara, Steve Holmes, Alicia Rhodes, Hillary Scott, Marco

One great thing about corporate porn is that, even if you don’t like it for a host of other reasons, there will be at least five sex scenes hitting all the standard angles. Let’s go from there. “Black Market Bayou” is likely the worst porn movie I will see this

Sunny Sara Sloane is surprised when she learns from battle-weary bartender Tabitha Stevens the local legend that, deep under Crystal Lake, is “some kind of monster with flesh-eatin’ jizz.” Official Friday the 13th Porn Parody Studio: Zero Tolerance Director: Gary Orona Starring: Sara Sloane, Asa Akira, Kagney Linn Karter, Courtney

On the boxcover of “Race Relations 1,” Nicole Ray suggests that she didn’t know what she had coming. I suppose we can cut her some slack since it’s reverse cowgirl… The fact that this title is “Race Relations 1,” however, makes me think that producers Blacks On Blondes didn’t think

If, as the copy states, “Hot women in their late twenties get fucked by young studs,” we are left to wonder to whom the title is addressed, and how old that person must be. Certainly an awkward Bar Mitzvah gift. Prolific and seemingly hellhound-hunted director Jim Powers combines a no-nonsense