What do you feel like doing today? You want to check out Angelina Jolie’s boobs for a while? Awesome, that’s what we feel like doing. There’s something about her tall, tan, toned beauty–and let’s not forget her exquisite acting abilities–that we crave from time to time, and rather than pick up a tabloid and get embarrassed holding it in line at Rite Aid, we thought we’d sit down and watch back-to-back movies in which Angelina Jolie shows her front.
1.Mojave Moon: Ooh, yeah, 1996 Angelina Jolie time. This movie is centered around Al McCord (played by Danny Aiello, who we love), a nice guy who gives the gorgeous Ellie (Angelina Jolie) a ride into the Mojave Desert, where her mother lives. Al falls in love with Ellie’s mother, Julie (Anne Archer, who is indeed mighty fine), Julie’s boyfriend doesn’t like that one bit. Dead bodies show up in trunks, cars get stolen, shots are fired, and somehow, around fifty minutes into the movie, Danny Aiello has a chat with Angelina Jolie as she soaps up in the shower. It’s a funny film, perhaps a tad heartwarming–it has the sort of warmth you get when you smile at stupidity–and you can’t go wrong with Angelina Jolie and hot water.
2. Original Sin: Ignore the fact that Angelina Jolie was nominated for a Golden Raspberry Award for Worst Actress for this role, because it’s one of our favorites of hers. “Original Sin” is set in Cuba in the 19th century, where wealthy businessman Antonio Banderas has sent away for a wife from America. Angelina Jolie arrives, and the two immediately realize they had been deceiving each other; she had been sending him pictures of a less-attractive woman, and he had been telling her he was poor. Once they figure out they’re both rich and gorgeous, they get married and fuck like crazy. If we told you any more, it’d ruin all the twists and turns, so we’ll just tell you that Thomas Jane plays a big part in this film and that yes, he is quite creepy in this role, too. When does Angelina get naked? We’re glad you asked! You can find her bod at 17:00, 33:00, 1:00:20, and 1:02:00. Satisfy your craving!
[At top: a clip from "Original Sin" (movies.netflix.com)]