Give it a poke, in fact, give it twenty pokes. Watch it bounce back, notice how your finger causes a ripple–or doesn’t–in the flesh. Consider your own personal preferences: do you like your meat rare, medium, or well-done? If you don’t eat meat, think about peaches and plums. Actually, don’t think about food, think about butts. Stay focused. All this stress will be worth it when you sink your teeth into the perfect posterior.