The Joys Of The Open Road: A Guide To Giving (And Receiving) Road Head

The Joys Of The Open Road: A Guide To Giving (And Receiving) Road HeadNothing spices up a long (or short) car trip quite like a trip below the seat belt. But if you’re not careful, that little detour to paradise could wind up sending you and your partner to the hospital.

So how to navigate the path of pleasure without risking your life? Take a few tips from your good friend Fleshbot, and it should all be smooth sailing driving.

DO: Wait until you’ve hit a relatively straight, empty stretch of road. Let’s face it: getting a blowjob is going to distract a person from driving, and there’s no way around it. In order to make your excursion as safe as possible, you need to make sure you’re in a place where the car can pretty much run on cruise control. Other cars, sudden twists and turns, and random surprises (like deer jumping in front of the car!) are going to make it much, much more difficult to enjoy oral pleasure (and much, much easier to get into an accident).

DON’T: Surprise your partner. Sure, the element of surprise seems sexy—but when you’re driving a car, the element of surprise is more likely to be deadly.

DO: Take it slow. Giving head in a moving car is already impressive enough—there’s no need to show off your deepthroating skils, or how fast and furious you can suck a cock. If you hit a bump mid-session, it could set off gagging (or, even worse, biting)…and that’s just not much fun. (And while you’re at it—using a hand to help out never hurt anyone.)

DO: Adjust the steering wheel. Hey, there needs to be room for a head to move up and down!

DON’T: Go downtown during heavy traffic. The more cars on the road, the more likely things are to go wrong…and the less likely that anyone will end up with a happy ending.

DO: Swallow. Normally we’d leave this as a head giver’s choice…but who wants to risk cum stains on the upholstery?

· Thumbnail star: Jenna Haze contemplates the pros and cons of road head (premiumpass.com)

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  • Anonymous

    She’s in the wrong seat.

  • tekdemon

    Well considering that a body showed up last year at the local morgue missing it’s genitals…which had been bitten off during impact and caused the decedent to bleed to death…I’m going to skip this particular sexual escapade.
    Also, being a coma because you had choked on your boyfriend’s detached penis and become hypoxic until paramedics arrived is still somewhat embarrassing even if you survive and wake up.
    Seriously there’s no safe way to do this so if you insist you should be prepared for a pretty gruesome outcome, and that’s assuming you don’t hit someone else and survive to go to jail.

  • thePrototype

    True story: We were tboned by a drunk driver about 1 minute after I finished giving some road head. It could have been disastrous, now I only do that during the middle of the day in perfect driving conditions.

  • dirtybacon

    road head is ok, but getting it on while driving is a better feat! (This is the one crazy feat I get to brag about, so just indulge me ;) )