We’ll be liveblogging all night, so keep tuned in (signed on?) to find out who shows up and what goes down.
UPDATE: A full list of the award winners can be found here.
I know we said we’d get started at 8:45, but there’s tons of people here, and I’m impatient. In case you’ve forgotten who the top five contender for the Fleshbot Readers’ Choice Awards are, here’s a recap!
In other news: The Baroness and Dante Posh just rolled through, as did Syd Blakovich, Jiz Lee, and that crew.
Just saw Michael Musto from the Village Voice, looking brilliant as always. Joanna Angel is parked by the bar with her date. And… Yep, Syd Blakovich exits the bar double-fisting drinks. It’s going to be a good time.
There’s a mysterious naked man with long hair, a mask, and a fedora standing on the bar. No one seems to notice. (If you haven’t guessed by now, I’m stuck by the bar.)
Much of the adult entertainment crowd was just ushered upstairs for a photo session. The show should be starting soon.
Oh snap! It’s beginning! Justin Bond is singing the dirtiest song he knows and he looks like a healthy Liza Minnelli.
John Cameron Mitchell just joined Justin on the stage. They both look adorable. The first presenter: Justine Joli! Pinch me.
Jimmy Jane wins the Sexiest Technology Award!
FYI the awards that are being given out are giant, steel, double-sided dildos, just like in the picture.
Michael Lucas is presenting the next award for the Sexiest Fashion Newcomers. Michael Lucas is one busy man. Google him.
The Blonds win! They are so blond.
Mantrix is now performing. The crowd is entranced.
I may have gotten that last name wrong. This is hard to describe. It’s like Cirque du Soleil, but less French and more nude.
Julie Atlas Muz is presenting the award for Sexiest Art. How do you decide what art is sexiest? Doesn’t it depend on the genre. Ah, this is about comic art. I’m slightly hard of hearing. Anyway, the award goes to Paul Pope, but Ben
Naples Nabors is accepting for him.
Presenters can’t help exclaiming over the glory of the Double-Sided Dildo award.
Rob Roth: “CGI is for hot cocks that never need fluffing.” This next award is for the world’s best gay-porn-computer-generated animation.
The award goes to “Pirate’s Booty!” We love that film.
Prince of Porn Performance Art, Tom Judson is taking the stage. He actually just got here (I saw him go by), and he seems a bit flustered. He’s presenting the Mainstream Crossover Award. I wonder who that will go to…
PS: Did you know that Tom Judson was the oldest recipient of the GayVN Performer of the Year award?
Sasha Grey wins! Surprise(?)! Unfortunately, she’s not here. She’s in Portugal. But she did record a lovely video for us/plug for her new project.
This is all moving really fast. In fact, this is probably the first award show to be ahead of schedule.
Our beloved Lux is taking the stage (she’s so graceful!), and it’s time for the Readers’ Choice Awards:
Marco Blaze wins the for the men! Unfortunately, he’s overseas (and didn’t record a video for us).
For the fems, it’s Supreme Commandress Joanna Angel! And she’s here! And she’s flustered. And she is sooo fine. (Some think she looks a bit like Sarah Silverman. What do you think?)
Justine Joli is doing a striptease to “You Can Leave Your Hat On.” Her hat is definitely the only thing still on.
It’s intermission time! Let’s all browse Fleshbot while we wait for more pornstars to come on stage! Yay!
Also, Lux would like to take this moment to thank nJoy, who sponsored this event by making those epic dildo-awards: The Eleven. See you all in a jiff.
Intermission consists of five foxy representatives from The Box grinding on stage. My personal favorite is the guy wearing a black corset with matching gas mask.
They’re playing Mickey Avalon’s “My Dick.” I know this song by heart. It’s embarrassing.
Patrice O’Neal is here. He’s looking good!
Justine Joli (who I’m slowly becoming obsessed with) walks like she’s stripteasing. All. The. Time. It’s amazing.
Some people with a camera just came by and asked me what I’m doing. They had me read some stuff. If you ever see me somewhere looking sweaty and confused, that’s what that was.
Something is happening…
Someone’s performing a dance as a vagina. Not in the Georgia O’Keefe way. Like a real, pulsing, quaking, dripping vagina. With a big, sequined clit.
I guess Intermission is over?
Lorelei Lee is looking gorgeous. As is Belladonna, whose dress says something very Whitney Houston to me. (In a “Bodyguard” way.)
It’s time for the Mainstream-to-Porn Crossover Award. As everyone knows, Levi Johnson is the lucky recipient. He just let us know that his magazine spread comes out next week. Any guesses what he’ll do with The Eleven?
Ryan Keely is presenting the next award: Sexiest Advertising.
Who is our favorite, billboard-bombing, butt-showing clothing company? American Apparel, of course. Marsha Brady (no relation) is accepting on behalf of the company.
And it’s time for another act! A famous S&M performer, Mistress Lee and her Pet Rudy.
Could that be Mistress Jiz Lee?
It’s hard to see back here. But I can hear the Cat-O’-Nine-Tails.
Actually, it’s more of a contortionist/acrobatic act. They are, after all, circus folk. And I don’t think it was Jiz Lee. Liveblogging fail.
Jonathan Ames, writer/creator of Bored to Death (among other things), is presenting the Sexiest TV Award.
“This was a good year for couch potatoes. Especially couch potatoes with a libido.”
True Blood wins! I love that show. No one is here to receive the award, so Jonathan Ames is taking the dildo home. Real talk, Jonathan Ames. Real talk.
Our last presenter is Joey Arias, who asks, “Is everybody horny? Who likes cum?”
The winner of the Fleshbot Lifetime Sexy Fashion Award is Patricia Field! If you don’t know, look her up. I’m busy applauding.
The night is winding down. How will we finish off this beautiful event?
Oh dear, she has a dildo.
Cannot describe what just went on. Amazing. I’ll try to fill this in later. Wow.
Sadly, that brings us to the end of the night. We’ve had a lot of fun here, and there should be more pics and such tomorrow. Until then, thanks for being with us. We love you all.
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Previously: The First Annual Fleshbot Awards