It’s December: a time for year-in-review lists and holiday shopping guides. And so, in lieu of a sex toy review, this week we present a list of the top ten sex toys of 2008.
After a year of furiously fapping, what toys have left the strongest impression? What toys do I never leave home without—and which are gaining dust in the back of my dresser drawer? Read on and find out:
10) The We-Vibe: Combining vibration with the sexin’ always seems like a great idea—but for some reason, it never seems to work out quite right. Given the mechanics of sex, cock rings can’t offer a continuous source of vibration—and for some reason, no one’s thought of a better solution. Well, until the We-Vibe, that is. Though it may take some exploration to find out how it works best for you, it’s a wonderful way to add a little extra bump to your bump and grind.
9) The Bo: But if you’d rather stick with a cock ring, we can offer no better choice than the Bo. Unlike its cheap, gummy rubber counterparts, Bo is made of sterilizable silicone, and comes with a rechargeable battery. Clearly, a cock ring for the future.
The Babeland Nubby G: The Nubby G was my first love, Babeland’s phthalate free version provides the same wonderful thrills without the fear of toxic chemicals. Even better, it’s cheap! **BEST BUY**
7) The Curve: Until I met the Curve, I thought I hated dildos. With it’s beautiful, g-spotterific curves, this toy will have you singing its praises within minutes.
6) The Mia: Going on a trip, and worried someone will see you charging your vibe? The Mia can easily pass for a USB thumb drive… until you slip it between your legs. **BEST DISCREET TOY**
5) The Delight: With its delicious curves and many, many vibe patterns, this vibe most certainly is a delight—I just wish it had a simpler navigation system.
4) The Jollie: With it’s massive girth and unwieldy appearance, the Jollie may not be for everyone. But if you manage to work it inside your parts, you may find yourself transported to a place you never even knew existed.
3) The Eleven: Sure, we don’t all have $300 to spend on a dildo: but if you do, why not purchase a beautifully carved, 11 inch steel dildo? Think of it as an investment. **BEST LUXURY TOY**
2) The Gigi: Sleek, rechargeable, g-spot friendly, and with an adorable mod design, the Gigi’s fun to look at, fun to use, and offers some of the best controls ever seen on a dildo.
1) The SaSi: With all the hype and advanced press, I expected to end up heavily disappointed by the SaSi—what vibe could possibly that good? Yet with its innovative design, the SaSi managed to impress even this jaded reviewer, landing it the top slot in this year’s sex toy list.
Worst Toy Of 2008: G-Pilot: Whoever thought it was a great idea to make a small plastic shoehorn to guide the penis towards the gspot needs to take some anatomy lessons, stat.
