Last time on Who Wants To Fuck Your Country?, we sparked some serious debate (mostly about what constitutes a Latin American country, but whatever). To be fair to the rest of the planet, the folks at Guanabee have applied their controversial mathematical perambulations to several other nations — while we applied our babe-gathering skills to prove them wrong.
So here’s another round of Country Fuckability Values, and once again it’s sure to create even more international tension: No Scandinavia? Japan, home of the kings and queens of kink, scoring a mere 65? What’s up with Africa? (And note that the U.S. is staying of out this fight, for once.) Still, it had to be done. Just be polite when you tell us how dumb we are for not picking that one model you love who is so much hotter than the one we did.
. . .
· Africa: (Yes, we know Africa is not a country. It’s not our list.) (CFV = 67)
Iman, Mrs. David Bowie (born in Ethiopia)
. . .
· Australia: (CFV = 75)
Kylie Minogue, locomotive driver
. . .
· Canada: (CFV = 45)
Pamela Anderson, amateur pornstar
. . .
· China: (CFV = 40)
Zhang Ziyi, ninja
. . .
· France: (CFV = 60)
Carla Bruni, the First Lady (you can only imagine what the rest of the country looks like!)
. . .
· Germany: (CFV = 50)
Heidi Klum, Runway dictator
. . .
· Greece: (CFV = 40)
Suzi Simpson, Playboy’s Miss January 1992 (born in Athens)
. . .
· India: (CFV = 55)
Sunny Leone, world’s biggest Indian-Canadian pornstar
. . .
· Ireland: (CFV = 70)
Maureen O’Hara, feisty redhead (rowwwr)
. . .
· Italy: (CFV = 80)
Monica Bellucci, walking sex bomb
. . .
· Japan: (CFV = 65)
Maria Ozawa, raping ninja
. . .
· Korea: (CFV = 50)
Sung Hi Lee, Playboy model
. . .
· Netherlands: (CFV = 75)
Sylvia Kristel, Emmanuelle, star of adolescent dreams
. . .
· Russia: (CFV = 40)
Anna Kournikova, tennis “prodigy”
. . .
· Saudi Arabia: (CFV = 30)
Wafah Dufour, Osama bin Laden’s infidel niece
. . .
· Thailand:(CFV = 50)
Luci Thai, pornstar (may or may not be of Thai decent, but she’s got the name at least)
. . .
· United Kingdom: (CFV = 70)
Keeley Hazell, um … duh?
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· The International Fuckability Hierarchy Index: Rest Of World Edition (guanabee.com)
Previously: How Fuckable Is Your Country? Latin Edition
