How Fuckable Is Your Country? Latin American Edition

In an effort to quantify, qualify and classify all there is to know about our sexual omniverse, our sexy friends at Guanabee have attempted to help every one out there determine just how easy it is to get laid depending on what country you call home. They’ve assigned all the major countries of the Spanish-speaking world (and Brazil) a number known as the “Country Fuckability Value” (CFV). We’re not really sure how it’s calculated, because it’s rooted in high-end mathematic theory and therefore too complex for ~~dummies like us~~ the average blogger. But we really like the idea behind it, even if what we really want to know is how accurate it is. To test the system, we’ve chosen what we think is the hottest babe from each of the countries in the chart and lined them up to see how their national ratings translate to real-life bangability. Granted, some of our choices might not coincide with your own; after all, identifying hot Uruguayan pornstars is not our strong suit, and sometimes we’ve had to resort to national descent instead of actual citizenship. If you disagree with our choices or the rankings, defend your nation’s honor in the comments. That said, and without further ado … let the battle of the babes begin.

. . .

· Argentina: (CFV = 80)
Carolina “Pampita” Ardohain , model

· Bolivia: (CFV = 40)
Raquel Welch, actress (Bolivian father)

· Brazil: (CFV = 75)
Gisele Bundchen, supermodel

· Chile: (CFV = 60)
Leonor Varela, Cleopatra look-alike

· Colombia: (CFV = 60)
Shakira, hip shaker

· Costa Rica: (CFV = 60)
Candice Michelle, WWE Diva, Playboy model, URL salesgirl, foot worshipee (Costa Rican decent)

· Cuba: (CFV = 50)
Vida Guerra, ass technician

· Dominican Republic: (CFV = 40)
Judy Reyes, fake nurse

· Ecuador: (CFV = 35)
Christina Aguilera, MILF-in-training (father born in Ecuador)

· El Salvador: (CFV = 35)
Christy Turlington, supermodel (mother from El Salvador)

· Guatemala: (CFV = 20)
Daphne Zuniga , friend to animals? (Guatemalan father)

· Honduras: (CFV = 25)
America Ferrera, ugly person (Honduran parents, actually much hotter than this)

· Mexico: (CFV = 70)
Sativa Rose, star of “I’ve Been Sodomized”

· Nicaragua: (CFV = 50)
Barbara Carrera, Bond girl

· Panama: (CFV = 45)
Ester Cordet, Miss October 1974

· Paraguay:(CFV = 30)
Cindy Taylor, TV host

· Peru: (CFV = 40)
Marina Mora, Miss Peru 2001

· Puerto Rico: (CFV = 60)
Vanessa Del Rio, distinguished porn veteran

· Spain*: (CFV = 80)
Penelope Cruz, actress (nudeactress.net)

(*Ed. note: Yes, we know Spain isn’t in Latin America — but it was in the original list we based this post on. We also just wanted to include Penelope Cruz somehow.)

· Uruguay: (CFV = 45)
Natalia Oreiro, famous person (?)

· Venezuela: (CFV = 55)
Aida Yespica, hottie

- – -

· The International Fuckability Hierarchy Index: (guanabee.com)

Tags: Babes, Central America, Feature, Latina, Pornstars, sexy science corner, South America, Straight

Author:Dashiell

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yourfriendandneighbor

Hello, that is the ugliest Mexican woman ever. You could have at least used Salma Hayek. Jessica Alba is half.
Daniel Mauser

America Ferrera is pretty hot. I would hit that.
tonemgub

Penelope Cruz is not a latin american girl. She’s Spaniard (remember Spain IS in EUROPE, not in Latin America)
Dashiell Bennett

@tonemgub: We know, but Spain was on the original list so we included it. As usual in these situations, we blame NAFTA.
DontFearTheReaper

As much as I LURVEEEE Vannessa, You could have picked Roselyn Sanchez to represent Puerto Rico.
Anonymous

HI, I´m from Peru, and Marina Mora is not the most beautiful and fuckable girl here, she was Miss Peru some years ago, but now she´s fat !, really, appears that some girls earn good money to start eating & eating and eating..
she have a cute face, good ass, but now she´s fat !
Peruvian princess like Alexis Amore, why not ? she born in Peru.
And why not to check this page [www.chicasperu.com] fulled of amateur peruvian girls ?
Cameron RS

Argentina FTW? This should bode well for Alexis Bledel, who was also born there.
yourfriendandneighbor

@tonemgub: The name of the original article is The International Fuckability Hierarchy Index: Latin Countries. Spain is the original Latin country. If you don’t understand how, read this.
indiepixels

What happen to Maria Sanchez, I mean Jasmine Byrne?
Anyway, they all pretty much blow the top off the fuckable meter! Vanessa Del Rio(The Belladonna of her era)in her day was as hot they came. Now fifty plus pounds heavier(and much older), she is still very fuckable.
Adding Penelope was cool too. The chick looks like a big dish of ice cream that makes you wanna lick the bowl over and over again.
Dashiell Bennett

@Coming Into The Game, ♪♪ ♪♪♪ #J23 – The Superstar Receiver,…: Well, I was going ask who you would add to the list, but then you had to go and call people names and that’s when I remembered that I don’t care what you think.

No disrespect, of course!
Dashiell Bennett

@pipileptico: Thanks for the tip.
Come a little Miroslav Klose You’re My Kind of Man

Honduras & Mexico leave a smile on my face, but Chile & Cuba have left me gasping. I am quite fond of Srta Varela, & I have warmed to Vida Guerra (even if she’s prolly a Cuban-American monomaniac that would talk about deposing Castro even while she makes love).

Also, I will vounch for Coming into the game, the Superstar receiver for your Upper Deck Toronto BbbbbbJjjjjjs…. He’s good people. Don’t ban ‘im.
Anonymous

@ yourfriendandneighbor: Uh, actually youre wrong, the original Latin country is Italy (roman empire), and if you don’t know why then youre a retard. Your comment might have made some sense had you been talking about Hispanic countries, and even so I disagree.