January 9, 2008 | 6 Comments

Sell Your Sex Tape (But Not To Us, OK?)

2008_01_09.jpgAt this point in our porn-weary blogging careers (porn years are much longer than canine ones, trust us), you pretty much have to pay us to look at a sex tape—especially where some of them are concerned—and not the other way around. Yet, the plucky smut barons at Sell Your Sex Tape seem to be offering $2K for anyone who wants to make them a homemade sex video. Look out Red Light District! And hello Corey Clark; we think we hear your comeback ‘a callin’. That is, if anyone still knows what a “tape” is.

· Sell Your Sex Tape (sellyoursextape.com, via Indie Nudes)

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Author:violet

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  • Anonymous

    I dunno…a minute and a half of “Jenna & Albert” is rather uncomfortable to watch, so I can barely imagine 7 hours of those two.
    Admittedly, the “Tabitha & Burt” one might be fun. Aside from Burt’s baby talk, they seem kinda charming.

  • Conrad

    The first couple seem like they scripted their conversations. Which may just be a matter of production quality. Nonetheless, though I don’t doubt they are a real couple, they need better material.

    All and all it’s not a bad deal. Between this, the $10,000+ you can get for donating eggs (it’s quite the process, but I’ve known women to get over $50,000), and men being able to donate sperm (about $50), you could make quite the career without ever actually being an adult performer.

    Men have the best deal though, $50 per ejaculate, we make 50,000 sperm per minute, and can ejaculate at least every 5-10 minutes (it starts to hurt after a while, so really you could be making $2-500 a day for the rest of your life), without the aid of hormones, or invasive proceedures.

    Not that I have thought about it at great lengths…

  • Conrad

    As a side note:

    Jenna and Albert don’t seem to understand the proper proceedures required in having non-painful anal intercourse.

  • Violet Blue

    actually, I hang out with a sperm bank teller sometimes (long story), and she says that guys have to wait several days before they can “donate”, and then are pretty much useless to that particular bank (sperm is frozen, guy is done). unless they look like Brad Pitt and have PhD’s — no shit, it’s that sadly stereotypical. so sperm donating: not such a steady source of income.

    * yes, she’s cute and has “helped” donors. totally true.

  • dirtybacon

    @Violet: the question is… where is this sperm bank?? *nudge nudge wink wink*

    and yeah, there really isn’t a market for professional sperm donor… I’ve researched this for many years.

  • Conrad

    @Violet:If you can find multiple banks, and don’t mind traveling(sort of like a long haul truck driver,but with a crazy story to tell) …

    Also, it was much easier to donate sperm in the past, a lot of places now require men to give family historys, write essays, include head shots, etc…

    So I’ll revise and say it’s easier for men if you can find a sperm pawn shop. Or you are a somewhat attractive male prostitute.