Those content-slingers at Maxim are lazy. First of all, you should only include sex scenes that were filmed in earnest, so movies like Kingpin and Van Wylder should not even count. Second of all, they omitted the swimming pool scene from Showgirls where Elizabeth Berkley thrashes around on Kyle MacLachlan’s rod like a harpooned marlin. Any cineaste can tell you that no list of bad sex scenes is complete without the inclusion of this vulva-drying, boner-repelling on-screen coupling.