Sex Blog Roundup: Say What?

December 7, 2007
JONNO

Do you ever get sick of hearing how peachy keen everyone else's sex life seems to be? A few smoky glances over cocktails and people invariably wind up back in the hot tub for an all night candlelight orgy with their one true love while violins play in the background. Todays' roundup of some of our favorite recent sex writing on the interweb, however, suggests that it ain't necessarily so. Ask the stripper giving a lap dance to the sniper, or the submissive who dates "nice" girls, or the fellow who can't stand a face full of bushy pussy, and you'll find that even those who score are no more content than the rest of us.

Even Jefferson can't connect the dots ... but he'll try after the jump.

Sex Blog Roundup
by Jefferson

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Strippers, Snipers and Bombs

It's midnight and I'm shimmying in front of a coked-up sniper named Jim. Moments like these it's good to stop and ask yourself, "Self, is this really what you want to be doing?" I learned to talk to myself that way in college statistics and I've never stopped.

"You'll see," Jim says. "You'll fucking see me on TV after we pull this off."

"I don't have a TV, hon."

He doesn't hear me. I don't leave. There is no place else to learn this, to understand why people are willing and excited to get in airplanes and go to other countries and kill people at the drop of an order. My red dress, the Dorothy dress, has fallen to the floor. I kick it up to my hand behind me as I lean forward and squeeze my boobs together in his face.

- Hobo Stripper

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Sex With Vanilla Women

We met for brunch one day and she brought up the ever-lovin' topic of sex.

She talked about some of her bad experiences and a few good ones. I didn't want to come right out and declare my submission, instead I just said "I prefer to be . . . a giver."

Her eyebrows raised a bit and we had a few too many Bloody Marys.

"I'll bet I'm kinkier than you," she declared.

"Ummm, I doubt that."

- Unspeakable Axe

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Ten Things I've Learned abut Sex III: Leave Your Clothing on a Pile

I won't relate to you here the entire story of the night I lost my virginity. Believe me, it is long and filled with girly cat fights and drunken decisions--you don't want to hear it. Oh, and the after story, including the part where I find out that the guy hadn't really broken up with his girlfriend AND it was her birthday? That's even longer. Let's just say that I haven't seen that guy since . . . well . . . the day after I lost my virginity.

- Between The Sheets

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Everyone Hates Bush!

We had a shower together. She had a huge bush. What a major turn off. I don't get girls who don't shave. I've mentioned this a million times in the blog, but it seems I'm not getting through since I still meet girls with hairy pussies. Ladies, if there's one thing you remember from my blog, remember this: shave. (And take it up the ass, of course.)

- Lust, Sex and Sodomy

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Lose Track of Time?

I was ready to head home. The night was almost over and I was already plotting out the order of the closing chores to get our butts out the door in the shortest amount of time. I really should have known better than to extend what amounts to a hand-embossed, engraved invitation to the universe at large.

However, I did and fortune gave me a cheeky grin walking in the front door.

- Cast Upon the Thorns

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MILF Barbie

She was wearing a pink midriff sleeveless top holding two large tits with protruding nipples, very blonde hair, but the best part was the barely covering pink skirt. It went maybe two-and-a-half to three inches below her pussy.

In an area that usually has people wearing track pants, this was perhaps one of the best things I've seen in a long time. Thankfully, my store is usually quiet, so I didn't have irritating customers disrupting my mental undressing time.

- Wank Log

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Thumbnail via Legs N Feet (TGP/preview gallery @ kinky-cleo.com, via Ask Jolene)

Previously: Sex Blog Roundup Archive