Don’t you hate spending the better part of your life fighting against the glass ceiling to build a respectable judicial career only to have some jackass plaintiff come before you who you once gave a drunken blowjob to in college? Especially one who willing admits to emitting high-pitched girlish screams that set off car alarms when receiving fellatio? No one really comes out of this story alive. (abovethelaw.com, via Jezebel)