Marital Aid Test Kitchen: Rock Chick

I'm down with sex toys that have awesome names that don't include the word dong, and the Rock Chick is not only dong-free, but ready to rock. When I gazed upon it for the first time, I thought, "Hmmm, which way is up?" The rock chick kinda looks like one of those stress relief thingies or hand muscle builder uppers (or, less appetizingly, a big purple turd), so if you accidentally leave it out while your grandmother is visiting, she might not point to it and yell, "Dildo!". Then I discovered that the toy's website has a delightfully unsexy diagram of the toy in use, which emphasizes the hot hot heat the weird little purple toy brings to the g-spot, but it's also a dual action toy shaped to nuzzle the clit as well. Isn't technology wonderful?

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In concept, the Rock Chick is superawesome: its silicone so it's capable of being totally sterilized, it's got a little removable bullet vibe and the silicone caries the vibrations really well, it's curved to hit both g-spot and clit, and the clit end has nice little nubbies. In practice, every body is different, so it probably really rocks some chicks while it makes others (me) feel like they are humping a purple boomerang.

Though the Rock Chick is hit or miss, if you're not opposed to re-gifting sterilized sex toys, you could pass it on to a friend. If that squicks you or your friend doesn't like it when you say, "One time I put that in my vagina!" it'll probably make a great (and fairly discreet) chew toy for some happy dog. All that aside, the toy's non-dong qualities give me plenty of hope for the future of sex toys.
- AR

Rock Chick Vibrators (rock-chick.com)

Previously in the MATK: Kochi Japanese Anime Doll, Njoy Toys, Big Blue Waterproof Vibe, Squirting Strap-On Dildo, The Monkey Rocker, Doc Johnson's Cuddles, 2 Tone Dual Delight, 5-in-1 Finger Vibes, Pleasure Pearl Masturbator, Rabbit Rider, The G-Spot Hot Handle, Heavy Love Balls, Pink Indulgence Massage Wand